List of Cosby episodes

The episodes for the CBS television sitcom Cosby aired from September 16, 1996 to April 28, 2000, with 95 total produced spanning four seasons.

Season 1 (1996–1997)

Episode No.	Title	Director	Writer(s)	Original air date	Prod. code
1	"Pilot"	John Whitesell	David Renwick	September 16, 1996	101
Corporate downsizing forces Hilton Lucas into an unplanned retirement. Hilton must watch Shelly the turtle. Guest star: Sean Whalen (Dry-cleaner clerk)
2	"It's My Party"	John Whitesell	David Landsberg	September 23, 1996	102
Hilton expects a retirement surprise party from his former employer. Guest stars: Gerry Gibson (Bob), Harvey Vernon (Mr. Stevens); Co-stars: Carlos Lacamara (Carlos), Ellen Albertini Dow (Mrs. DiNovio), and Brent Hinkley (Frank).
3	"Neighborhood Watch"	John Whitesell	Vanessa Middleton	September 30, 1996	103
Crime-fighter Hilton goes overboard. Guest stars: Tom Mardirosian (Buddy), Danton Stone (Plumber), Rosemary De Angelis (Sidra); Co-stars: Alice Drummond (Mrs. Bagley), Lisa Louise Langford (Car lady), John Scurti (Brown coat man), Skipp Sudduth (Phil).
4	"Happily Ever Hilton"	John Whitesell	Adam Belanoff	October 7, 1996	104
Hilton tries to get his old job back. Guest stars: Klea Scott (Nurse Suzanne Cratchet), Joe Zaloom (Screaming patient); Co-stars: Zach Grenier (Fruit stand patron), Allison Janney (Podiatry nurse), José Ramón Rosario (Hit-and-run), Tony Sirico (Teddy Coo-Coo).
5	"The Best Little Antique Shop in Astoria"	Tim Ryder	David Wyatt	October 14, 1996	105
Hilton takes a job at an antiques store but doesn't know there's a secret brothel in the back.
6	"One Foot in Your Mouth"	John Whitesell	Bernie Orenstein Saul Turteltaub	October 21, 1996	106
Hilton gets caught in his own lie when he tries to get out of attending a wedding. Guest stars: Richard Libertini (Dave), Marian Seldes (Elaine); Co-stars: Rona Figueroa (Kim), Michael Goldfinger (Norman), Aida Turturro (Norman's wife).
7	"Natural Born Debtors"	John Whitesell	Vanessa Middleton	October 28, 1996	107
Hilton tries to help Pauline's overly sensitive, financially irresponsible goddaughter. Guest stars: Meredith Gordon (Wendy O'Brien), Marcia Jean Kurtz (Gladys), Peter Jay Fernandez (Mr. Carter).
8	"The Two Mr. Lucases"	John Whitesell	Adam Belanoff	November 4, 1996	108
Because of a hospital mixup, Hilton gets the colonoscopy that was meant for his cousin. Guest stars: Míriam Colón (Lillian Lucas), Karen Shallo (Nurse Angela), Gerry Bamman (Dr. Martin), Jerry Mayer (Coffee machine repairman?); Co-stars: Joan Buddenhagen (mean nurse), Harry Jefferson (Earl Lucas).
9	"No Nudes Is Good Nudes"	John Whitesell	David Landsberg David Wyatt	November 11, 1996	109
Hilton helps the nude model from his art class. Guest stars: Edward Hibbert (Mr. Woodhall), Jernard Burks (Model's husband), Shari Headley (Model).
10	"Basketball Story"	John Whitesell	Frank Mula	November 18, 1996	110
Lucky basketball ticketholder Hilton will win $1 million if he can make a free throw. Guest stars: Howard David (Sports announcer), Penny Hardaway (Himself), Jennifer Lewis (Bernice), Ed Wheeler (Leon); Co-stars: Dalia Fayed (Rochelle), Richard Ziman (Million-dollar announcer)
11	"Guard Almighty"	John Whitesell	Bernie Orenstein Saul Turteltaub	November 25, 1996	111
Security guard Hilton deals with a robber and the Yankees. Guest stars: David Cone (Himself), Ray Girardin, Harry Murphy, Joe Torre (Himself); Co-stars: Patti Karr, Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Rebecca Creskoff, Arthur Nascarella (Frank Volpicella)
12	"The Broken Reflection"	John Whitesell	Dennis Klein	December 2, 1996	112
Hilton's brother (Roscoe Lee Brown) is in town for an honorary degree. Guest star: Roscoe Lee Brown (George Lucas); Co-star: Ping Wu (Happy Memories photographer).
13	"Tempus Lucas"	John Whitesell	John Rogers	December 16, 1996	113
Hilton hits the gym a little too hard while trying to get in shape for a physical examination. Guest stars: Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Keith Reddin (Mr. Acker), Robert Stanton (Insurance salesman) Featuring: Clark Terry (Gym trainer)
14	"Guess Whose President Is Coming to Dinner"	John Whitesell	David Landsberg	January 6, 1997	114
Hilton calls a radio talk show and gets invited to dine with the President. Guest stars: Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Rudy Giuliani (Himself), Anthony Heald (Benjamin Dean); Co-stars: Michael Dellafamina (Homeless man), Anthony Heald (President's aide)
15	"Brave New Hilton"	John Whitesell	Elise Allen	January 13, 1997	115
Hilton helps when a buddy's goose-feather business is down. Guest stars: Jerry Becker (Rupert Macy), Julius Carry (Bradshaw Kinsy), Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Penny Johnson (Penny Bradshaw),
16	"Lucas Platonicus"	John Whitesell	John Rogers Chris Downey	February 3, 1997	116
Hilton attempts satellite-dish installation. After pursuing Erica for 10 years, Griffin decides to finally give up. Guest stars: Daryl "Chill" Mitchell (Mike Julien), Al Espinosa (Jeff)
17	"Valentine's Day"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	February 10, 1997	117
When Hilton realizes that he has bought Ruth a scarf for Valentine's Day that she already has, he panics and tells her he bought tickets to see singer Jeffrey Osborne.
18	"Florida"	John Whitesell	Frank Mula	February 17, 1997	118
A blizzard convinces Hilton and Ruth to move to Florida. Guest stars: Audrie J. Neenan (Mrs. Balaban), Lynn Cohen (Dorothy), Frank Vincent (Dorothy's husband); Featuring: Norm Lewis, Said Sayrafiezadeh (Store owner)
19	"Anniversary Waltz"	John Whitesell	Bob Kurtz Eric Brand	February 24, 1997	119
Hilton tries to get Ruth's wedding band engraved to renew their wedding vows. Guest stars: Lisa Nicole Carson (Tina), Earle Hyman (Reverend Mitchell), Marc John Jefferies (Davey)
20	"That Darn Cat"	John Whitesell	Howard Meyers	March 3, 1997	120
Erica moves back to live with Hilton and Ruth, bringing Sherman the cat, while a discarded positive pregnancy test then has everyone jumping to conclusions. Co-stars: Joseph D'Onofrio (Video-store clerk), Linda Powell (Stephanie)
21	"I'm OK, You're Hilton"	John Whitesell	Adam Belanoff	March 10, 1997	121
Hilton has a wonderful time giving advice to his therapy group. Guest stars: Frankie R. Faison (Ron Edwards), Siobhan Fallon (Therapist); Co-stars: Tony Darrow (Bartender), Jackie Hoffman (Ellen McAfee), Marc John Jefferies (Davey); Featuring: Garry Pastore (Police officer), Hardy Rawls (TV announcer)
22	"The Return of the Charlites"	John Whitesell	Vanessa Middleton	April 28, 1997	122
Ruth gets a chance to be in the spotlight when superstar friend (Patti LaBelle) comes to town. Special guest star: Patti LaBelle as Charlene
23	"My Dinner with Methuselah"	John Whitesell	Elise Allen Chris Downey	May 5, 1997	123
Ruth arranges a blind date for Pauline, while Hilton advises Griffin about impressing his sophisticated girlfriend. Guest star: Peter Jacobson (Richard); Featuring: Red Buttons (Otto Tibbles)
24	"Hilton's Playland"	John Whitesell	Richard Goodman Jacqueline McKinley	May 12, 1997	124
Erica's TV-producer boyfriend regrets giving Hilton a job on a children's show. Special guest star: Tim Conway (Happy Clock – Happy); Guest star: Darryl M. Bell (Julius)
25	"Social Insecurity"	John Whitesell	Vanessa Middleton	May 19, 1997	125
Hilton must correct Social Security's notion that he is dead. Guest stars: Marcia Jean Kurtz (Social Security clerk), James F. Murtaugh (Mr. Benjamin), Keith Smith (Mr. Brathwaite), Robert Stanton (Mr. Acker); Featuring: Teddy Coluca

Season 2 (1997–1998)

No. in season	No. in series	Title	Director	Writer(s)	Original air date	Prod. code
1	26	"About My Life"	John Whitesell	David Landsberg	September 15, 1997	201
Erica and Griffin move into the Lucas household, tensions rise in the house, and a preschools opens next door. Guest star: Judy Reyes as Preschool teacher – Miss Reyes
2	27	"Wake Up and Smell the Coffeehouse"	John Whitesell	Eric Brand, Robert Kurtz	September 22, 1997	202
Hilton brings coffee and cookies to the struggling flower shop and hits pay dirt. Guest star: Stewart Steinberg
3	28	"The Rules"	John Whitesell	Vanessa Middleton	September 29, 1997	203
When Hilton realizes that Griffin and Erica's friends are taking over his house by watching his television and eating all his food, he decides that if they live in his house, Griffin and Erica will have to live by his rules. Reluctantly, Griffin and Erica agree to abide by Hilton's strict new set of house rules, including Rule #5: thou shall not alloweth men upstairs. So when Erica's boyfriend, Julius (guest star Darryl M. Bell, reprising the role), shows up in her bedroom, Erica attempts to keep it a secret from her father. Meanwhile, Hilton is busy on a mission to kill a stray mouse – although Julius mistakenly believes that he is the target of Hilton's assassination plans. Wood Harris appears in this episode.
4	29	"Two Cents"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	October 6, 1997	204
When Griffin's non-stop eating starts to get on Hilton's nerves, and Hilton's non-stop opinion-giving begins to get to Griffin, the two challenge each other to a 24-hour contest to see which man has more self-control. Meanwhile, Ruth, Erica and Pauline decide that if they have to put up with the men's nonsense, they are going to have a little fun at their expense. And fun they have as they make Griffin suffer watching them eat a three-course meal of his favorite foods and Hilton agonize as he watches Erica walk out the door for a Las Vegas weekend getaway with Julius!
5	30	"Older and Out"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	October 13, 1997	205
Hilton is overjoyed when he meets new friends Chuck and Larry and joins their "Older and Out" team, since he's also older and he's "out" keeping busy. Ruth discovers that Chuck is gay, and she mistakenly believes that her husband of more than 30 years may have feelings for a man! Blaming herself for letting the spark go out of the marriage, Ruth sets off to win him back before a surprised Hilton discovers the real meaning of "Older and Out."
6	31	"Lucas Smartypantsicus"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	October 20, 1997	206
Pauline is absolutely thrilled that after years of being the single friend, she has finally become a couple with her new boyfriend, Gregory, a self-absorbed, self-proclaimed genius who disturbs Hilton. So when she decides to dump him because he's too uptight, Ruth thinks that Hilton is really the one to blame and sends him off to remedy the situation. But when Hilton, Griffin and Gregory team up at The Steinway Street Pub, they end up good buddies, and big, big winners too, in a trivia game.
7	32	"The Last Man Standing"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	October 27, 1997	207
A doctor places Hilton under strict quarantine after he catches the stomach flu. Griffin warns Hilton not to escape quarantine, but he doesn't listen and, one by one, everyone in the household drops, leaving Hilton to don his nurse's uniform. As he runs from sickbed to sickbed tending to his patients' needs, Hilton discovers that the members of his household are not at their best when they are sick – but he's determined to maintain his excellent bedside manner.
8	33	"Dating Games"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	November 3, 1997	208
Ruth's obnoxious sister-in-law Debra (Debbie Allen) brags continually about her daughter's wedding plans; Guest stars: Busta Rhymes, Rhonda Ross Kendrick
9	34	"The Pilot (Not the Pilot)"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	November 10, 1997	209
Hilton and Griffin find themselves aboard a plane with a deranged passenger (William Shatner).
10	35	"Lucas Raymondicus"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	November 17, 1997	210
In this crossover episode, Frank Barone (Peter Boyle) has been telling his son Ray Barone (Ray Romano) about sinking the winning shot in the 1955 Queens championship since the day he was born. So when Frank pleads with Hilton to help him save face with his son by lying for him, Hilton reluctantly agrees. But then Gwendolyn Brooks High plans a ceremony honoring Frank – and he tells the school that Hilton can't come because he is dead – Hilton decides that enough is enough and goes forward to set the record straight.
11	36	"Shall We Dance?"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	November 24, 1997	211
Ruth gives reluctant Hilton tap-dancing lessons for his birthday.
12	37	"The Two Hilton Lucases"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	December 15, 1997	212
Hilton and Griffin get jobs as telemarketers, hoping to win a fabulous office prize, a weekend for two at The Plaza Hotel in Manhattan. Hilton is afraid to tell his wife, knowing she will disapprove of his new job. Instead, he lies and claims that his new job is driving Danny Aiello's limo. Griffin tries to improve his sales record by taking Hilton's advice to create a new persona – he pretends to be Hilton. So when Ruthie overhears "Hilton Lucas" on a sexy phone call, she thinks that her husband is having an affair and blames the whole thing on his new employer, Aiello.
13	38	"A Team of His Own"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	January 5, 1998	213
Hilton and Ruth coach opposing basketball teams. Co Stars: Zelda Harris (Fireflies forward – Nicki), Keith Franklin (Warriors hungry boy – Chewy), Jason Fuchs (Warriors scared boy – David), Kevin Rahsaan Grant (Warriors hypochondriac – Jamaal), Kym Hampton (herself), Teesa Weatherspoon – (herself), Tatyana Bass, Vyacheslav Bokhman (Grove boy with Russian circus), Steve Feldman.
14	39	"Brazil"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	January 12, 1998	214
When the city closes down the Flower Cafe because of a misplaced vent, Pauline suggests that she and Ruth indulge in a pampering weekend at a spa. Hilton's only assignment while she's gone is to get the vent fixed. Carla. the chaperone of a Brazilian girls' choir, asks to rent out the coffee shop for a small get-together, and Hilton hesitantly agrees. After all, Pauline and Ruth are out of town and what could possibly go wrong?
15	40	"Old Yeller"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	January 19, 1998	215
Despite Ruth's insistence that family and friends should never work together, Hilton goes to work for Griffin narrating children's stories. He just can't refuse the temptation for some creative rewriting, and Hilton puts his own spin on some classic kids' tales. Will he have his poetic license revoked? Meanwhile, Pauline is so captivated by the handsome young man temporarily working at the coffee shop that she can't bring herself to fire him.
16	41	"Out to Launch"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	February 2, 1998	216
Hilton is bequeathed a boat by a wealthy man he once helped at the airport. Despite Ruth's insistence that he doesn't have the stamina or the money to support a boating hobby, Hilton persists – including spending three days on the boat with Griffin, parked outside the house in the freezing cold.
17	42	"Fifteen Minutes of Fame"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	February 23, 1998	217
While Hilton is working at the coffee house, he meets Rob Burnett and Paul Shaffer from the Late Show with David Letterman. He talks them into letting him be on the show.
18	43	"Mud"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	March 2, 1998	218
A plate that Hilton made as a gift for Ruth has been switched for one made by a famous abstract artist. It is worth some $15,000, and now, thanks to Pauline, it is missing.
19	44	"Enter Lucas"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	March 9, 1998	219
Pauline tries her hand at playwriting for a course she's taking at the community center. Following Hilton's advice about writing about something "real," she turns out a thinly-disguised comedy about the Lucas family. Hilton is the only one who can't see who the lead character is based on – until he volunteers to play the part on stage. Broadway veteran Philip Bosco is Pauline's flamboyant playwriting teacher, who casts Hilton in her comedy as a sarcastic, irascible coot.
20	45	"1040 Not-So-EZ"	Don Scardino	Howard Meyers	April 6, 1998	220
It's April 15th and Hilton hasn't even started working on his taxes, a fact he wants to make sure Ruth doesn't discover. Ruth has other things on her mind, however – she and Pauline have an appointment with Mr. Rollins of the SBA to obtain another loan for the Flower Café. At the Café, Erica has agreed to look after Jurnee, her friend's younger sister. A desperate Hilton arrives and asks Erica for help with his taxes, but she reminds him she's a lawyer, not an accountant. Meanwhile, Mr. Rollins, very negative and skeptical, says he needs to see Ruth's and Pauline's personal tax returns before they can proceed. Ruth calls Hilton for their tax information, and he promises to get everything to her in an hour. Erica sends Jurnee over to the house to watch TV, where it shortly becomes clear that the little girl knows more about doing taxes (her dad's an accountant) than Hilton. She gets the taxes wrapped up and over to Ruth, Pauline and Mr. Rollins, and Hilton is saved.
21	46	"Men Are from Mars Women Are from Astoria"	Arthur Lewis	Howard Meyers	April 27, 1998	221
Erica and her girlfriends, unable to find "Mr. Right," take Ruth's advise about changing their dating habits and set out on "The Great American Manhunt." As the girls despair about their single state, Ruth tries to explain that men are like old cars – you've just got to find one that works, and if you take care of it long enough, eventually it will be worth something! Taking her advice, the ladies set out in search of the guy least likely to turn into a lemon.
22	47	"On the Rocks"	Don Scardino	Norman Steinberg	May 4, 1998	222
When Ruth and Hilton have a major fight they assess the changes in their lives.
23	48	"Love Intervention"	Don Scardino	Chris Downey	May 11, 1998	223
The Lucases play cupid for smitten Griffin.
24	49	"The First Gentleman"	Don Scardino	Tyrone Finch Tom Purcell	May 18, 1998	224
Ruth is President of the Businessmen's Roundtable, and Hilton the Ladies auxiliary. In a rather surreal cold open, Hilton speaks with a long dead Jack Benny via special effects. Tony Bennett also appears in this episode.

Season 3 (1998–1999)

No. in season	No. in series	Title	Director	Writer(s)	Original air date	Prod. code
1	50	"Now Is the Time, the Walrus Said"	Tim Ryder	Tom Straw	September 21, 1998	301
Hilton's new responsibility, looking after 11-year-old Jurnee while her dad is at work, becomes a little too hot to handle when Jurnee asks him a complicated question about the birds and bees. Not wanting to interfere in Jurnee's upbringing, and looking for a way to avoid having to answer himself, Hilton suggests that the curious Jurnee go to her dad for an explanation. No matter how difficult it is for Del to face the fact that Jurnee is growing up (perhaps a bit faster than he had hoped), with coaching from Hilton, he finally appears ready to have 'the talk.'
2	51	"Do Not Overheat"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	September 28, 1998	302
Griffin and Erica work out a financial deal to move into Griffin's house on a landlord-tenant basis – thus giving Hilton and Ruth back their privacy ? only to have Griffin's house accidentally burn to the ground. Hilton's visions of spending romantic evenings alone with Ruth are over before they've even begun. And, when Erica and Griffin realize that everything destroyed in the fire was either borrowed, rented or on loan, they decide it's time to grow up and start taking "ownership" of their lives.
3	52	"Chemistry"	Tim Ryder	Adam Belanoff	October 5, 1998	303
Hilton is devastated to learn that Erica is breaking up with her latest boyfriend, Gil (David Alan Grier) – a handsome, well-educated jazz musician who is everything that Hilton could ever want in a guy and more. When Erica and Gil mutually decide to call it quits, it is Hilton who takes the news the hardest, since he has developed his own meaningful relationship with Gil – primarily because he represents the jazzman Hilton always wanted to be. How will Hilton go on? All he does is sit by the phone and wait for Gil to call! It's true that break-ups can be hard – but usually for the two people involved.
4	53	"Lucas Discordia"	Tim Ryder	John Rogers	October 12, 1998	304
Petty differences about irritating personal habits threaten to escalate into a major brawl when Ruth and Pauline plan a "girls' night out" in Manhattan, and Hilton insists on acting as their chauffeur.
5	54	"The Greatest Gift"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	October 19, 1998	305
A major argument erupts when Ruth accidentally discovers that Erica has been hiding all the gifts she has given her over the years. When Ruth confronts Erica about only pretending to like the gifts that Ruth put so much time and care into buying, it sparks the disagreement. On the one hand, Ruth feels that she does not know her own daughter, and on the flip side, Erica feels that her mother doesn't bother to learn about her likes and dislikes. Although Hilton desperately wants to stay out of their argument, he is left with no alternative and attempts to coerce the women into a joint shopping trip. The goal – buy something that is pleasing to them both without driving him over the edge.
6	55	"Lucas Matriculus"	Tim Ryder	John Rogers	October 26, 1998	306
When Griffin accompanies Hilton to "Grandparents Day" at Jurnee's school and adds his two cents to the science lesson, it quickly becomes apparent that he is a natural at teaching and holding the kids' interest. Who would have thought?? Hilton is thrilled that Griffin has uncovered a talent for this most noble profession, while Erica is more than ticked off when she learns that Griffin achieved a higher GPA than she did in college. At first resistant to the idea of working hard for little pay and loads of responsibility, Griffin is ultimately swept up with the idea of molding the minds of America's young – heaven help them.
7	56	"Playground Scar"	Don Scardino	Tom Reeder	November 2, 1998	307
After Jurnee expresses her fondness for schoolmate Kevin and he retaliates by shoving her on the school playground, amateur psychologist Hilton explains his theory of how "playground scarring" can affect a woman for life. According to Hilton, when women are unable to trust, unable to commit, their problems can always be traced back to a bad playground experience when they were deeply humiliated by a boy they liked. To this day, Ruth has problems with trust because of a certain Kenneth P. Watson, who purposely teetered when he should have tottered, requiring a young Ruth to get stitches. When it comes to Jurnee, however, Hilton is determined not to have history repeat itself.
8	57	"The Episode Episode"	Tim Ryder	Adam Belanoff	November 9, 1998	308
Hilton is sentenced to a life without pork chops, barbecue ribs and bacon when a doctor's visit reveals a too-high cholesterol count. A mouth-watering meal for Hilton now consists of tofu, steamed broccoli and "not-wurst" imitation hot dogs. New Jersey Nets player Jayson Williams guest stars as Jurnee's teacher, who adds his two-cents on the subject of Hilton's eating habits.
9	58	"Judgment Day"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	November 16, 1998	309
Hilton's steaming when a klutzy customer spills coffee on her dress, admits it's her own fault – and then sues the Flower Cafe for $3,000. Guest star: Kevin James makes a cameo appearance as Doug Heffernan, from the sitcom The King of Queens.
10	59	"Turkey Day"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	November 23, 1998	310
When Hilton offers to make Jurnee's Thanksgiving Day Parade turkey costume from scratch, it comes out to be just that... a turkey of a costume. So imagine Hilton's joy when the queen of domesticity, Martha Stewart, shows up at the coffee shop bearing the most realistic looking turkey outfit that anyone's ever seen and leaves it behind by mistake. But, when Martha Stewart returns asking if anyone has seen the costume, will Hilton's guilt get the best of him... or will Jurnee be the best-dressed turkey in the parade?
11	60	"This Old Friend"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	December 14, 1998	311
Hilton becomes nervous when, after a two-year silence, he hears from an old friend who only makes contact when he needs a handout.
12	61	"The Awful Truth"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	January 11, 1999	312
Del's new girlfriend, Karen, agonizes over a secret that she is worried about sharing with him: the youth who passes as her kid brother is actually her son.
13	62	"Refrigerator Logic"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	January 18, 1999	313
Hilton is beyond frustrated when his newly purchased state-of-the-art refrigerator breaks down and he can't get any customer satisfaction. His repeated attempts to reach a human customer service representatite fail, and then he's told it will take an eternity to get the necessary refrigerator part. Hilton takes matters into his own hands and becomes a one-man consumer crusader.
14	63	"Lucas Absentia"	Tim Ryder	John Rogers	January 25, 1999	314
Griffin contemplates quitting the teaching profession when his first day as a substitute teacher is a disaster. The Lucases lend themselves out as mock students so that Griffin can practice his teaching techniques on them – although their misguided attempt to help might just turn him off teaching forever.
15	64	"False Alarm"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	February 1, 1999	315
After the Lucas home is burglarized, Hilton invests in a security system – only to discover that the thief is someone he knows.
16	65	"A Very Nice Dance"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	February 8, 1999	316
Hilton and Ruth recall their first date many years ago. Their flashbacks are done through animated sequences, and of course, both of them have widely different versions of what happened.
17	66	"Ol' Betsy"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	February 15, 1999	317
While searching for a rare part for his beloved turntable, Hilton bumps into an old friend from his bachelor days, Fred. When Hilton and Fred start reminiscing about how they double-dated sisters Mattie and Roberta Singleton, Hilton decides to play matchmaker and prompts Fred into learning whatever became of Mattie. Even now, years later, Fred can't help wondering what might have happened if they remained a couple... and, thanks to Hilton, he may finally get a chance to find out.
18	67	"Afterschool Delight"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	February 22, 1999	318
Jurnee is aghast when she finds out that her dad intends to date the "meanest" teacher at her school. Del is so troubled by Jurnee's reaction to his interest in Ms. Malone that he is ready to call off their date. But Hilton reminds him that almost every person can remember a teacher who was too strict, gave too much homework or expected too much of a student – and usually ended up being the one who made the greatest impact on the student later in life.
19	68	"Will Power"	Tim Ryder	Dan Wilcox	March 1, 1999	319
Hilton is attempting to help Jurnee with her "Romeo and Juliet" homework assignment when his true feelings about The Bard come out: Why couldn't Shakespeare simply speak in plain English rather than using all of that fancy, confusing language? Alas, Shakespeare showeth up in the Lucas kitchen to tutor Hilton personally. Will it be "all's well that ends well?"
20	69	"Lucas Illuminus"	Don Scardino	John Rogers	March 17, 1999	320
Hilton volunteers as a reader for a retired, blind English literature professor and, upon realizing his gift for teaching, urges him to return to the classroom. Guest star: Anthony Quinn as Professor Christo, whose failing eyesight and advanced age caused him to leave behind the profession he loves so much.
21	70	"Timerity"	Tim Ryder	Tom Straw	April 5, 1999	321
Hilton is caught in the middle when his curmudgeonly friend, Tim, stages a rent strike against his landlord.
22	71	"The Party's Over"	Tim Ryder	Howard Meyers	April 26, 1999	322
Hilton is stunned when 11-year-old Jurnee, left in his care while her father is away, returns from a friend's birthday party drunk. Hilton and Ruth are adamant about finding out who spiked the birthday punch and caused several of the children to awaken to wicked hangovers the following morning. But, Jurnee is not budging for fear that she will be labeled a squealer among her friends. Hilton is determined to make Jurnee understand that protecting the guilty person is sometimes just as bad as being guilty yourself.
23	72	"The Vesey Method"	Don Scardino	Bill Boulware	May 3, 1999	323
When Griffin finds himself face to face with the group of tough, unmotivated students, he struggles to find a way to reach them and open their minds to the wonders of learning – something fellow teacher Mr. Fleming lost enthusiasm for a long time ago.
24	73	"He Who Hesitates Is Lucas"	Don Scardino	Howard Meyers	May 10, 1999	324
When Hilton and Ruth hear that their "little girl" is getting married, they couldn't be happier for her, or themselves, since this would mean one less person in their crowded house. Erica's intentions, however, are for the newlyweds to remain in her parent's house indefinitely to save some money. Are Hilton's tears of joy or sorrow?
25	74	"War Stories"	Don Scardino	Tom Reeder	May 17, 1999	325
Griffin's trust in his new girlfriend Anita is put to the test when her job as a conference planner puts her smack in the middle of a young millionaires' convention, on the season finale. Rather than heeding Hilton's advice to give Anita some space, Griffin decides to pop in on the convention and find out for himself how loyal Anita is – which prompts Hilton to reminisce about the anxious time he spent away from Ruth, soon after they first met, agonizing over whether or not she was thinking of him as often as he was of her. "Prequel Monday" kicks off with an animated flashback sequence of Hilton as an enlisted Navy man.

Season 4 (1999–2000)

No. in season	No. in series	Title	Director	Writer(s)	Original air date	Prod. code
1	75	"My Spy"	Don Scardino	Becky Mode Tom Straw	September 29, 1999	401
Hilton falls asleep during an I Spy marathon. He dreams that he and his old partner Kelly Robinson have been put on a new case in Hong Kong. However, Erica keeps interrupting Hilton's dream to discuss her wedding preparations. The rest of the cast play parts in the dream.
2	76	"The Wedding"	Don Scardino	Nick LeRose Becky Mode	October 6, 1999	402
Hilton has to pay the wedding organizers for their services as Erica's wedding nears, but Ruth is more concerned with why the bride is not falling apart yet.
3	77	"Book 'Em, Griff O"	Tim Ryder	Becky Mode J.J. Paulsen	October 13, 1999	403
Hilton urges Griffin to do something to replace his school's outdated textbooks, and Erica and Darien return from their honeymoon.
4	78	"Lucas Apocalypse"	Don Scardino	Becky Mode John Rogers	October 20, 1999	404
When Griffin tries to prepare for Y2K by installing a generator, he causes a premature blackout for the entire neighborhood.
5	79	"A Teacher's Life"	Don Scardino	Matt Karis Becky Mode	October 27, 1999	405
Getting through a typical day is hard enough, but it becomes an ordeal for Griffin when everyone demands his time on the day he is preparing for a date with a beautiful flight attendant.
6	80	"There's Something About Hilton"	Don Scardino	Nick LeRose Becky Mode	November 3, 1999	406
A strange woman comes to the shop under the impression that Hilton is her husband, Charlie.
7	81	"Superstar"	Don Scardino	Nick LeRose Becky Mode Tom Reeder	November 17, 1999	407
Griffin has a dream in which teachers are given the same elite status and salary as professional athletes or actors.
8	82	"The Parent Trap"	Don Scardino	Matt Karis Becky Mode	December 15, 1999	408
Erica visits a student's home to get his mother more involved in his education.
9	83	"One for the Books"	Don Scardino	Becky Mode Tom Reeder	December 22, 1999	409
Ruth and Pauline try to help save a friend's failing bookstore by annexing it to the Flower Cafe.
10	84	"Loving Madeline"	Tim Ryder	Becky Mode	December 29, 1999	410
The cast presents a heartfelt tribute to Madeline Kahn, with clips highlighting her character Pauline Fox.
11	85	"The Hilton Hilton"	Tim Ryder	Becky Mode	January 14, 2000	411
Darien's late arrival to an important family dinner causes a fight between Hilton and Ruth.
12	86	"Chilly Scenes of Winter Golf"	Don Scardino	Tyrone Fitch Becky Mode Tom Purcell	January 21, 2000	412
When Ruth teaches Erica how to play golf, a rivalry begins between the two women that even extends to cooking.
13	87	"To Catch a Thief"	Tim Ryder	Becky Mode	January 28, 2000	413
Hilton finds himself in the middle of a bank heist.
14	88	"Raising Paranoia"	Don Scardino	Becky Mode Tom Straw	March 3, 2000	414
Griffin, Erica and Darien try to convince a drug-addicted friend to enter rehab.
15	89	"It's a Wonderful Wife"	John Whitesell	Becky Mode Tom Reeder Tom Straw	March 10, 2000	415
For a school paper, Keisha discovers intriguing facts about Ruth's past.
16	90	"Perfect Valentine"	Tim Ryder	Karen Maser Becky Mode	March 31, 2000	416
Griffin's inability to deal with the return of his estranged father, who abandoned him 15 years earlier, causes problems in his relationship with Rebecca.
17	91	"A Pair of Threes Beats a Flush Every Time"	Don Scardino	Becky Mode Tom Straw	April 7, 2000	417
Hilton discovers that a former high school buddy is now homeless.
18	92	"Thursday's Child"	John Whitesell	Tyrone Fitch Becky Mode	April 14, 2000	418
A foster child in Erica's class wants to move in with the Lucases.
19	93	"Kids Eat the Darndest Things"	John Whitesell	Becky Mode Kriss Turner	April 14, 2000	419
Griffin tries to encourage both his students and the Lucases to eat healthier foods.
20	94	"A Long Night's Journey"	Don Scardino	Sean Francis Becky Mode	April 21, 2000	420
Hilton suffers from insomnia for several days, falling asleep during the day at inopportune moments, causing Erica and Ruth embarrassment. When Hilton refuses to attend a sleep clinic, Griffin offers to set up a video camera in the Lucas' bedroom to record the night's activity to find the cause of Hilton's sleeplessness. The next morning, when the family gathers to watch the tape, no one is more surprised than Ruth to see that it is her snoring and kicking Hilton in her sleep that keeps him awake.
21	95	"The Song Remains the Same"	Don Scardino	Nick LeRose Becky Mode	April 28, 2000	421
Hilton passes his advice along to Erica and Darien on how to keep the romance alive in marriage.