List of Saturday Night Live commercial parodies

The following is a partial list of Saturday Night Live commercial parodies. On Saturday Night Live (SNL), a parody advertisement is commonly shown after the host's opening monologue. Many of the parodies were produced by James Signorelli. Fast food, beer, feminine hygiene products, toys, medications, financial institutions, and automobiles have been frequent targets.

The commercial parodies have even targeted the SNL producers. A self-parody commercial featured "The Best of the First 20 Minutes", a parody of Broadway Video's series of SNL compilation videos. It offered a compilation of bits from the Cameron Diaz/Smashing Pumpkins September 1998 episode before that episode had even finished.

In 1991, Kevin Nealon and Victoria Jackson hosted a clip show featuring many commercials entitled Saturday Night Live Goes Commercial. In early 1999, Will Ferrell hosted a follow-up special. In late 2005 and in March 2009, the special was updated, featuring commercials created since the airing of the original special.

Contents :

• A
• B
• C
• D
• E
• F
• G
• H
• I
• J
• K
• L
• M
• N
• O
• P
• Q
• R
• S
• T
• U
• V
• W
• X
• Y
• Z
• References

#

• 16 and Pregnant Spinoffs – A November 2010 ad finds MTV cashing in with spinoffs inspired by 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom, such as My Super Sweet 16 and Pregnant, America's Best Pregnant Dance Crew, Wild n Out with a Special Guest: A Baby, an edition of Cribs that feature baby cribs, and I'm Snooki and Pregnant. At the end, the MTV logo comes on with MTV: Maternity Television.^[1] (In an odd case of satirical prophecy, Snooki announced to US Magazine in March 2012 that yes, she was pregnant and engaged.)^[2]
• 24-Hour Energy for Dating Actresses: A once-daily energy supplement for men who have to deal with their amateur actress girlfriends (whether it's tolerating their musical-obsessed friends, their attempts at speaking in a foreign accent, their emotional breakdowns when they get rejected, seeing them in off-Broadway shows with younger, sexier actors, or their mediocre acting in local commercials). A female version for women who have to deal with hack stand-up comic boyfriends who always need to perform whenever people are around is also available (24-Hour Energy for Dating Stand-Up Comics).

A

• Abilify for Candidates  – "Because not everyone can be President," this version of the atypical antipsychotic is specially formulated for candidates in the 2016 race for the presidency, among them Rick Santorum (Taran Killam) and Mike Huckabee (Bobby Moynihan).^[3]
• Academy of Better Careers – spokesman Wendell Craig^[4] pitches a program for people to find jobs as stand-by operators.^[5]
• Action Cats – a parody of action-figure toys featuring plastic armor and weapons for live cats.^[6]
• Adobe – A car that is very affordable (sticker price: $179) but very unsafe, as it is made entirely of clay and "combines German engineering and Mexican know-how!"^[7]
• Adopt John Belushi for Christmas – Candice Bergen sells people on letting John Belushi stay at their place for the holidays.^[8]
• Al Sharpton's Casa De Sushi – Similar to Donald Trump's House of Wings or Derek Jeter's Taco Hole, Al Sharpton (as himself) opens a Japanese restaurant even though Sharpton himself hates the food and only admits to opening the restaurant so he can pay for his political campaign.^[9]
• Almost Pizza  – Parody of the DiGiorno's pizza commercials in which the pizza itself is molecularly unstable (it shatters like glass, then regroups and crawls on the floor).^[10]
• AM Ale – An alcoholic beverage for the morning because "you can't wait till afternoon".^[11]
• Amazin Lazer  – A consumer grade laser gun for cleaning up yard waste or for use in potential criminal acts.^[12]
• The Amazing Alexander – A 1986 ad promotes a Broadway theatre performance by a popular stage hypnotist (portrayed in performance still shots by Jon Lovitz). Audience members in the ad give the show unanimous praise—the same platitude, in fact, delivered in a hypnotic trance ("Terrific. I loved it. Much better than CATS. I'm going to see it again and again.").^[13]
• Amazon Mother's Day – Three guys (played by Jason Sudeikis, Bill Hader, and Taran Killam) try to surprise the women in their lives on Mother's Day (played by Kristen Wiig, Vanessa Bayer, and Nasim Pedrad) with typical gifts (such as breakfast in bed, bath items, and a new washer), only to find them masturbating to the erotic best-seller Fifty Shades of Grey (Wiig's character uses a vibrating muscle massager—which the daughter mistakes for a microphone, Bayer's character uses a detachable showerhead and a yellow dishwashing glove, and Pedrad's character leans against a shaky washer with a picture of Joel McHale on top of it). The commercial then advertises the Kindle for moms who want to read 50 Shades of Grey without their husbands knowing.^[14]
• America's Turning Gay – Combines parodies of 7 Up's "America's Turning 7-Up" advertisement campaign and Dr. Pepper's "Be a Pepper" ad campaign where small-town residents celebrate the sudden realization that they're homosexual.^[15]
• America's Worst Moments – Spokesman Chris Parnell pitches a commemorative plate collection featuring America's most shocking and embarrassing moments in politics and pop culture.^[16]
• American Cancer Society – Season six public service commercial where a spokeswoman (Gail Matthius) promises to discuss breast cancer and perform a self-exam on herself in an honest and open manner, but the promise is broken when the spokeswoman is shown with a striker bar covering her chest and explains the details of her self-exam in euphemisms.^[17]
• American Dope Growers Union – Laraine Newman (and several SNL castmembers and writers) support American-grown marijuana and the farmers who grow it.^[18]
• American Taser – A series of people—a pitchman (Chris Parnell), a police officer (Jason Sudeikis), a second pitchman (Darrell Hammond), a sexual predator (Seth Meyers), a businesswoman (Amy Poehler), an angry wife (Rachel Dratch), the angry wife's husband (Will Forte), a black man (Kenan Thompson), a racist nightwatchman (Bill Hader), a militant black man (Finesse Mitchell), a Star Trek geek (Andy Samberg), and a third pitchman (host Jason Lee) each demonstrate the latest models of tasers by shocking each other until the last person (Lee) shocks himself.^[19]
• ...and More – Tina-Tina Chenuse (Jenny Slate) promotes her stores that stock personalized novelties. The skits have 3 elements: Tina-Tina introducing herself, "Hi-lo, I'm Tina-Tina Chenuse", the store names always end with "and More" (e.g. "Car Horns and More"), and Tina-Tina always exclaims "Oh my God" somewhere in the sketch.^[20]
• And So This Is Hanukkah – promo for celebrity-packed Hanukkah special for those who know very little about the holiday^[21]
• Angora Bouquet – tranquilizer-laced facial cleanser that "washes your brain as well as your face".^[22]
• Angry Dog – dog food that turns any dog into a mindless killing machine. A picture of Michael Vick is on the package.^[23]
• Annuale – medicine that causes women to have one period a year, making them extremely violent (Tina Fey's office worker character is shown going after co-workers Bill Hader and Andy Samberg with a pink axe, while Amy Poehler's character is shown kicking a man, played by Fred Armisen in the groin and punching him in the face), greedy (Casey Wilson's character is shown shoveling an entire birthday cake in her mouth at a child's party), and sexually frustrated (Kristen Wiig's character is shown French kissing a dog as it licks her face) due to an excessive stream of hormones.^[24]
• Ass Don't Smell – personal hygiene spray intended to keep one's buttocks smelling fresh and clean; a parody of feminine hygiene sprays.^[25]
• Autoscent – features Gilda Radner smiling as she crouches near a tailpipe.^[26]
• Autumn's Eve Pumpkin Spice Douche: The feminine hygiene product that has the warm scent of fall.
• Autumn Fizz – "The Carbonated Douche".^[27]

B

• Baba Wawa Talks to Herself – TV special promo where Baba Wawa (Gilda Radner) interviews herself.^[28]
• BabySpanx  – Foundation garments used to slim down baby fat on infants. "I would never spank a baby, but I sure as hell would SPANX one!"^[29]
• Bad Idea Jeans – a commercial featuring scenes of people discussing what can be considered "bad ideas" (for example, "Normally I wear protection, but then I thought, 'When am I gonna make it back to Haiti?'"). After each scene, white text on a black background reads "BAD IDEA". Each scene also zooms in on each person wearing said jeans.^[30]
• Bad Seed – a venomous, near-hysterical Nancy Reagan (Terry Sweeney) debunks rumors that her daughter Patti's novel Home Front is based on real life, and pitches her own book that she co-wrote with Stephen King.^[31]
• Balz-Off – a medication that makes men more sensitive to women by killing off their testosterone levels.^[32]
• Banshee – a collection of 1970s-style speakers that serve in your place when you can't be there-or won't be there-at a funeral.^[33]
• Barkley's Bank – Former NBA player Charles Barkley has opened a bank in which he takes people's money and gambles with it in the hopes of either doubling their money or losing it all.^[34]
• Bathroom Monkey – a housewife (Janeane Garofalo) uses a disposable simian slave that keeps your bathroom clean.^[35]
• Berkeley Collection (Up Against The Wallpaper) – Jerry Rubin sells wallpaper with popular protest slogans from the 1960s and 1970s, from angry, anti-establishment protests to protests calling for peace and love.^[36]
• The Best of T.T. and Mario – a CD collection featuring the raunchy song stylings of a 1970s-era Peaches-and-Herb-type singing duo (Maya Rudolph and Kenan Thompson).^[37]
• Bierhoff House of German Coats  – German entrepreneurs (Fred Armisen and episode host Ben Affleck) sell bright orange winter coats to German tourists vacationing in New York City.^[38]
• Big Brawn Feminine Napkins – large, rough-looking menstruation pads. The ad, a parody of Brawny paper towels (with a jingle that parodies the song "Big Bad John"), features 50-foot-tall (15 m) lumberjack Will Ferrell aiding a regular-sized Molly Shannon in need in her bathroom—after tearing the roof from her house.^[39]
• Big Red – a toy Viking figure that spins around, spraying red liquid from the horns of a stereotypical Viking helmet (absurdist parody of water sprinkler-type toys). Furthermore, the liquid is revealed to be hazardous, as evidenced by the thick utility gloves included in the package included to clean up the resulting mess.^[40]
• Bio-Flex – parody of exercise equipment commercials where Will Ferrell is attacked by a half-man/half-monkey creature, which is considered a workout.^[41]
• The Bitchslap Method – an informercial featuring a self-help video course that teaches troubled married couples to bitch-slap their spouses into submission.^[42]
• Blaine Hotel – a bumper during Weekend Update in which Don Pardo announces that guests of Saturday Night Live stay at the Blaine Hotel, but is usually followed by a Weekend Update report about yet another grisly murder at the Blaine.^[43]
• Booty Bidness – rapper Ludacris (as himself) pitches a new line of women's businesswear with racy phrases on them, such as "Porn Star", "Bi-Curious", "Tasty" (written on the rear end of a skirt), and "Nympho".^[44]
• Bosley – a new procedure for hair transplants, but borrowing pubic hair.^[45]
• Brew Dude – a hat that dispenses beer for the college student who would rather party than study.^[46]
• Broadview Security – a parody of the actual Broadview Security commercials that infer that women living alone in large houses are the most likely to be victimized by any man she meets (including male family members, androgynous singer k.d. lang, and two kids using a trenchcoat to pose as an adult).^[47]
• Buddweiser Light – a parody of the Bud Light "Bring Out Your Best" ad campaign, featuring Robin Williams and Joe Piscopo as two ice hockey players at a faceoff. The payoff comes during the voiceover, when Piscopo says of Williams, "He ain't so bad. I don't know why my wife ran off with him." The two men drop gloves and fight as soon as the puck is dropped. The ad ends with Williams and Piscopo sitting on the ice and sharing a beer with gap-toothed smiles.^[48]
• Buffy the Vampire Slayer – a promo for The WB series announces that with Seinfeld leaving the air, Buffy Summers would be moving to New York and her show would become a Buffy/Seinfeld hybrid. ("A show about nothing... and vampires!")^[49]
• Bug-Off – Rather than simply killing a cockroach, this bug trap painfully tortures them and "gives them a lot to think about". The trap supposedly creates a signal that encourages the cockroach to enter, then adhesive glue holds the bug fast (much like a rat trap). Then, three tweezers stretch the legs in opposite directions til they snap off. Then a white-hot metal coil comes down and burns off the bug's reproductive glands of as well as making a sizable hole. Then the bug is beat senseless by its own dismembered legs. Finally, two pieces of cotton stuffed into the cockroach's orifices as food is dangled in front of it. Two kids are seen peering gleefully through a patented "viewing window".^[50]
• Buh-Weet Sings – All grown up, Buckwheat (Eddie Murphy) from Our Gang (known also as The Little Rascals) has recorded a compilation of songs sung in his own and very personal style, such as "Fee Tines a Mady", "Una Panoonah Banka", "Wookin' Pa Nub" and, in a dedication to his friend Alfalfa, "Barbah ob Dabill".^[51]
• Burger Master – a fast food restaurant where people can get their burgers done any way they want—no matter how weird or disgusting the requests.^[52]

C

• C.E.O Dreamboats – a magazine with famous businessmen as objects of desire for teenyboppers.^[53]
• Calvin Klein Cream Pies – in a parody of Andie MacDowell's Calvin Klein Jeans commercials, Julia Louis-Dreyfus plays an annoying jeans model who gets hit in the face with a custard pie after one of her shallow, rambling stories.^[54]
• Calvin Klein Jeans – a plus-sized Elizabeth Taylor (Joan Rivers) models CK Jeans, rambles on about her movie career, and snacks on some nearby food in this parody^[55]
• Calvin Klein Underwear – CK spokesperson Justin Bieber (Kate McKinnon) appears in a trio of 2015 ads; though Justin says, "I'm a big boy now", he behaves immaturely, poses and preens for the camera, and leaves the female model appearing with him unimpressed.^[56]
• Canis Cologne for Dogs – parody of a Calvin Klein fragrance ad.^[57]
• Caribbean Essence Bath Oil – foaming, scented bath enhancer that causes a West Indian man (Tracy Morgan) to pop up during the bath and carry his bathers across a beach.^[58]
• Carl Weathers for Governor – Following in the footsteps of his Predator co-stars Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jesse "The Body" Ventura, Carl Weathers promotes himself to be the next governor in any state that will take him.^[59]
• Carter 'N Sons BBQ – A commercial for a barbecue pork restaurant produced in 2002 but aired seven years later, with disclaimers stating that the restaurant's "Swine Fever" marketing tagline is in no way connected to the then-recent swine flu (H1N1 virus) pandemic.^[60]
• The Chameleon XLE – a luxury car on the inside, a dilapidated wreck on the outside—the better to deter the high risk of theft that accompanies luxury cars. The car features a simulated transmission fluid leak, mismatched hubcaps (and one exposed wheel painted school bus yellow), coat hanger antenna... and a supple leather-and-wood interior.^[61]
• Chantix – A commercial of a product to quit smoking, with a list of side effects that are worse than nicotine addiction itself ("If you notice changes in behavior such as a powerful, overwhelming desire to kill the person you love most, call your doctor right away.").^[62]
• cheapkids.net – a website dedicated to the sale of shoddy items for babies and toddlers for irresponsible parents.^[63]
• Chess for Girls! – a parody of the marketing of children's toys based on gender, this chess set (unrelated to the chess game in general) features pieces with Barbie doll-style bodies and chess piece heads, an accompanying dollhouse, beachwear, minivan, bubble blower, and so on. The tag line: "A classic game of strategy and wits... and bubbles!"^[64]
• Chewable Pampers – A line of Pampers diapers which contain flavor crystals that, once the diaper is soiled, turns into an edible treat.^[65]
• Chia Head – a parody of both the Chia Pet and Minoxidil; men with bald or receding hairlines use this product to give them nice green hair just like a Chia Pet. ("Not to be used in salads!")^[66]
• Chris Rock's White Person's Guide to Surviving The Apollo – Chris Rock, a veteran of Harlem's famed Apollo Theater, promotes his video that gives tips to aspiring white comedians and singers on how to win over the Apollo's vociferously critical audiences. Siobhan Fallon and guest host Rob Morrow appear in before-and-after footage.^[67]
• Cialis Turnt - Taran Killam demonstrates the effects of "the only pill that combats your erectile dysfunction while giving you that unbeatable hip-hop sensation of 'getting turnt'". Users are shown dancing wildly to music exclaiming "Everybody get turnt!" that resembles Lil Jon's song Turn Down for What.^[68]
• Citizens for a Better America – Dr. Swen Gazzara (Gilbert Gottfried) proves the value of hard work in America by asking Ronald Reagan to personally give him a "hum job".^[69]
• Clear-Rite – An "invisible" retainer that, it turns out, is just superglue applied directly to the teeth. The twist at the end of this commercial is that it's not actually a commercial.^[70]
• Clearasil – Appearing in SNL's Sprockets skit, which parodied German pop culture, a young woman uses Clearasil (or, in a strong German accent, "Clärasil") to get rid of her pimples and impress her new boyfriend. The English word "pimples", however, is confused in the sketch with "pimplen", a strong German slang word with the same meaning as the English "fuck" (in the sexual sense). As a result, the commercial tagline, "mach das pimplen kaput", means Clearasil will destroy your sex life.^[71]
• Closet Organizer – A man in a blue Spandex suit (Will Forte) is hired to organize anything in a closet that someone throws in.^[72]
• Clovin Hind Jeans – Gail Matthius plays Brooke Shields in this parody of Shields' racy Calvin Klein commercials.^[73]
• Cluckin' Chicken – a fast-food restaurant's animated mascot (voiced by Adam Sandler), when asked why he tastes so good, gleefully describes the process by which he is killed, decapitated and eviscerated, then flame-broiled (then, displaying a schematic chart, describes how he is consumed, digested, and eventually eliminated through defecation).^[74]
• CNN Pregnancy Test – just like its namesake network, this home pregnancy test delivers "relentless breaking news" alerts to a couple waiting (impatiently) to see if they're expecting a baby.^[75]
• Coldcock Malt Liquor – Tim Meadows appears in this parody of Billy Dee Williams' ads for Colt 45; with each sip from a tall can of this beverage, an animated fist arises from the can's label to whack the drinker upside the jaw. Ellen Cleghorne ("I ain't afraid of no can of beer!") and Chris Rock also appear.^[76]
• Colon Blow – In a parody of high-fiber cereal ads (notably Total and its "how many bowls" campaign), an off-screen voice tells cereal eater Phil Hartman he will need 30,000 bowls of his usual cereal to equal the fiber content in a single bowl of Colon Blow. (Also promoted is Super Colon Blow, with fiber content equal to that of 2.5 million bowls of Hartman's regular cereal.) When the large numbers are quoted, a pyramid of the same number of bowls elevates Hartman into the ionosphere.^[77]
• Colonel Belmont's Old Fashioned Horse Glue – Will Ferrell stars as Langford T. Belmont, a man whose family has been in the horse glue business for generations. It is a parody of commercials that try to appeal to old-fashioned values and tradition.^[78]
• Compulsion – a "Calvin Kleen" disinfectant, a parody of Obsession perfume and featuring an obsessive compulsive spokesmodel (played by Jan Hooks).^[79]
• Cookie Dough Sport – parody of Gatorade sports drink for athletes wherein Gatorade is replaced with cookie dough i.e. being poured over a winning coach or gulped down after a hard work out.^[80]
• Corn Chip Nail Tips – Maya Rudolph and Tracy Morgan appear in this parody of "hip" potato chip commercials, promoting corn chips that double as false fingernails.^[81]
• Count Chocula Silver – Count Chocula (Jimmy Fallon) promotes a newer version of his cereal made for the tastes of middle-aged people.^[82]
• Cracklin' Oat Flakes (Now with Ecstasy) – Will Ferrell wakes up to find that he has run out of his normal cereal, Cracklin' Oat Flakes. His wife then offers Cracklin' Oat Flakes, Now with Ecstasy. After one bowl, Ferrell creeps out his coworkers, makes out with Chris Parnell, then runs half-naked through the streets until he's seen in bed with a pacifier in his mouth and playing with a glowstick.^[83]
• Creeley's Soup – a sketch in which Gilda Radner, playing a child eating her soup, is annoyed by the announcer, who tells her that he will give her various things in exchange for her soup. She says "no" until she finally becomes frustrated and tells him, "No! Leave me alone! I'm eating!" The announcer then proceeds to tell her to take the little pieces of corn and shove them up into her nose. She asks why, and the reply is, "Because the Soup Man says so". She complies. After pouring the bowl of soup all over her nose (because according to the announcer "there's nothing better for a stuffy nose than nice hot soup"), the slogan for "Creeley's Soup" appears on the screen as the announcer intones: "Creeley's Soup – The Child Handler".^[84]
• The Crests and Troughs of Vernon Hawley, Jr. – featuring John Larroquette, the ad promotes an album about a Country-Western singer's bouts with alcoholism.^[85]
• Crystal Gravy – parody of the clear consumer products fad of the mid-1990s, specifically Crystal Pepsi commercials. Julia Sweeney enjoys a drumstick dipped in clear gravy straight from the jar, while Kevin Nealon gleefully splashes his face in the clear, gooey liquid.^[86]

D

• Daft Punk Commercial – a short teaser based on the release of a new Daft Punk album. Due to recent rumors and a presumed new album cover, it made imageboards go crazy
• Dallas: The Home Game – Charles Rocket pitches a home board game for dysfunctional families who can now act out their issues the same way the Ewings do on the prime time soap opera Dallas.^[87]
• Damn It, My Mom is on Facebook – a computer application that bowdlerizes teenagers' photographed wild antics and rebellious opinions from their mothers who have added them as friends on Facebook.^[88]
• Darnette Disposable Toilet – the toilet that you throw away after only one use. It takes just as many steps to install and remove as a regular toilet and costs $169.95.^[89]
• Daveheart – movie trailer to a Braveheart sequel focusing on William Wallace's cowardly brother, Dave Wallace (Gerard Butler).^[90]
• Dell Stator's 99-cent Toad Ranch – "Home of the World Famous Dell Stator Toad Pit and the Dell Stator Patented Broiling Method, where we can guarantee you the best 99-cent toad steak you'll ever eat!"^[91]
• Derek Jeter's Taco Hole – Derek Jeter pitches a taco restaurant in Nutley, New Jersey, with a jingle sung to the Beach Boys song "Kokomo".^[92]
• Dillon Edwards Investments – a conservative financial company advertises in a deadpan tone that they are finally on the Internet, with the only domain name left by the time they got around to it: "clownpenis.fart".^[93]
• Disco Meltdown – season six parody ad for a hip, new dance club in the reactor core of a nuclear power plant.^[94]
• Dissing Your Dog – Will Ferrell sells a dog training video for passive aggressive dog owners.^[95]
• Donald Trump's House of Wings – his own chicken wing restaurant, featuring Donald Trump as himself, Horatio Sanz as David Crosby, and four other castmembers (Seth Meyers, Kenan Thompson, Amy Poehler and Maya Rudolph) as singing employees in chicken costumes. The jingle is set to "Jump (For My Love)".^[96]
• Don't Buy Stuff You Can't Afford – Pitchman Chris Parnell promotes a book about money management to a clueless couple (Amy Poehler and host Steve Martin).^[97]
• Dopenhagen and Happy Daze – David Carradine plays a cowboy who likes to get high on marijuana he can chew instead of smoke. Parody of Copenhagen chewing tobacco.^[98]
• Dr. Porkenheimer's Boner Juice – parody of erectile dysfunction treatments (particularly Levitra), complete with the warning "If you experience an erection lasting longer than twenty-four hours, call up your friends and brag about it." Levitra's slogan "strong and lasting" is replaced by "thick and sturdy".^[99]
• Dr. Uncle Jimmy's Smokehouse and Outpatient Surgical Facility – a shady clinic that offers semi-professional surgery and mediocre barbecue cuisine.^[100]
• Dropping the L.B.'s With Missy E – Missy Elliott (Tracy Morgan) pitches a workout video featuring her impossible-to-imitate dance moves.^[101]
• Duncan Hines Brownie Husband – a brownie treat shaped like a life-sized man, designed specifically for the single woman.^[102]
• DynaCorp – an announcer (voice of Chris Parnell) confuses Jessica Simpson with food products similar to Chicken of the Sea-brand tuna. The ad parodies Simpson's remark on the MTV reality show Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica, where she asked Nick Lachey if Chicken of the Sea was tuna or chicken.^[103]
• Dyson Toilet – Parody of Dyson vacuum cleaner ads.^[104]

E

• Ed McMahon's School of Laughing — a school that trains people who want to make money by performing on laugh tracks.^[105]
• Einstein Express — an express courier service that handles late-arriving packages by literally sending them back in time to the desired arrival date. The slogan: "When it absolutely, positively has to be there the day before yesterday".^[106]
• Elián! The Cuban Boy — promo for a Disney-produced Broadway musical about Elián González (the real-life young boy turned over to his father in Cuba after resistance from relatives in Florida), with Christopher Walken as Fidel Castro.^[107]
• Empire – a promo parody of the FOX television series, which pokes fun on not having a non-African American cast member.
• "Energy for a Gullible America" — parodies Exxon's "Energy for a Strong America" campaign. Don Pardo is the voiceover announcer for a spot decrying high production costs for elaborate oil-company commercials and offering this as an excuse for high energy prices.^[108]
• The Englehart Five — The German quintet's new album has Helga Englehart (guest host Eva Longoria) and her brothers Rolf, Fritz, and Juergen (played respectively by Fred Armisen, Bill Hader, and Seth Meyers) singing songs about their brother Klaus' (Will Forte) death in a hunting accident with Rolf, who is now on trial for murder.^[109]
• Epoxy-Dent — A 1978 ad for "the strongest denture cream permitted by law". To prove its strength, a user bites down on a wood bar, which is lifted by a helicopter ("The Epoxy-Dent Chopper Test!").^[110]
• Estro-maxx – Going through a sex change is easier with Estro-maxx, a once-a-day pill that gives you all the hormones you need.^[111]
• EternaRest Coffin Mattresses — casket padding that outlasts the corpse.^[112]
• Eych! — "Eych! It's the only hairball remover that cats ask for by name." A spoof of Meow Mix, but instead the cats cough in an exceedingly funny manner.^[113]
• Excedrin RT — Queen Latifah plays a businesswoman who takes an aspirin to combat "racial tension" headaches (the "RT" in the product name) brought on by interns asking questions about the stereotypical behavior of black people.^[114]
• Exclusive Connections — Paris Hilton promotes a sex chat line catering to nerds who are interested in science fiction and fantasy movies.^[115]
• EZ Date — Parody of eHarmony and other matchmaking websites. All of the matches are alluded to be between prostitute and client.^[116]

F

• FX-70 Cheese Slicer – Candice Bergen pitches a Polaroid camera that dispenses cheese slices.^[117]
• Fear Factor, Jr. – season 29 fake promo for the latest installment of the NBC reality show Fear Factor; Joe Rogan (Fred Armisen) coerces children to perform dangerous and disgusting stunts, as on the regular Fear Factor. Rob Riggle (who wouldn't be an official cast member until season 30) has a brief appearance as the father of a child who has to eat maggot-ridden eggs Benedict or watch his parents divorce.^[118]
• Federline – Kevin Federline (Ashton Kutcher) pitches his new line of underwear to extricate himself from the shadow of his wife Britney Spears; shot in black-and-white, similar in style to early Calvin Klein commercials.^[119]
• Felina Cat Food – In a parody of onsite supermarket taste-test commercials, a TV pitchman dupes a housewife into eating tuna casserole made from cat food.^[120]
• First CityWide Change Bank – in a parody of banking service commercials, two ads promote a bank that only makes change (e.g. "you come to us with 16 quarters, 8 dimes, and 4 nickels, we can give you a 5 dollar bill"). How does First CityWide make money doing this? As one service rep says it, "The answer is simple: Volume".^[121][122]
• Flex – deodorant laced with steroids that provoke its users to behave like animals.^[123]
• Fresh Squeezed– Bob Uecker's new drink made from pureed baseballs.^[124]
• Frozen Mexican Dinner – A spoof of anti-constipation products and frozen dinners focuses on a musician who doesn't feel well during his band's practice session, believing he's constipated. A band mate introduces him to Frozen Mexican Dinner, a frozen dinner with medicine to fight constipation.^[125]
• Fruit Loops – poet Maya Angelou (David Alan Grier) extols the virtues of the Kellogg's cereal in her typical flowery, emotional, hyperbolic prose.^[126]
• The Fruiting – a movie trailer spoof for a horror flick where citrus fruits attack a family living in a haunted mansion.^[127]

G

• Gandhi and the Bandit – movie trailer spoof for Smokey and the Bandit.^[128]
• Gangsta Bitch Barbie – new Barbie doll perpetuates stereotypes of black people living in the ghetto (the doll comes with Jolly Ranchers, a pack of Newports, and a restraining order against her boyfriend, Tupac Ken). Parodies use of hip hop culture in advertisement.^[129]
• Galactic Prophylactic – prophylactics made with a steel core for extra durability. Parodies the Ron Popeil infomercials.^[130]
• Gary Busey Motorcycle Helmet – following Gary Busey's near-fatal helmetless motorcycle crash, this clip features Phil Hartman as Busey endorsing a new line of protective headgear. On top of the helmet is an enormous foam rubber "helmet protector", and also mentioned a "helmet protector protector", which was too large to be shown.^[131]
• Gary Hart – An ad pointing out that no matter what one does, "You can't get him out of your mind." The ad references the Gary Hart scandal of the late 1980s.^[132]
• Gas Right – A parody of Breathe-Right commercials. A giant strip that covers one's butt cheeks, eliminating the fart sound.
• Gaystrogen – a parody of the Estroven hormone drug; for men over 45 suffering from "queer loss".^[133]
• Gidget Goes to Shock Therapy – A psychiatrist (Jane Curtin) interrupts a sketch featuring three women acting like little girls to report that they all suffer from a mental disorder that makes them act childish.^[134]
• Girls Gone Wild—Katrina – Doug Stanhope (Jason Sudeikis) videotapes college girls stranded in the flooded city of New Orleans and offers them fresh water and beads in exchange for them flashing their breasts and "going wild".^[135]
• The Goombahs – Cashing in on HBO's successful franchise The Sopranos, Showtime creates its own show about a Mafia boss and his family.^[136]
• Grable and Lombard – movie trailer spoof about the lesbian wedding of Betty Grable and Carole Lombard.^[137]
• Graffiti: Say No – Rudolph Giuliani cracks down on graffiti artists defacing the city by adding insults next to their handiwork.
• Grayson Moorhead Securities – lampoons brokerage companies projecting a tradition of competence and trustworthiness, where the founding principles include making a list of clients, investing in white-owned businesses, and keeping the list in a safe place.^[138]
• Green & Fazio – A spoof of law commercials. Green and Fazio will help with lawsuits for bystanders, near-collisions and nuisance lawsuits, plus harassing defendants to settle.^[139]
• Grimaldi's Classic Creations – a crying baby-Jesus figurine that screams 24 hours a day from Christmas Day to Three Kings Day (January 6). (Nancy Walls, David Koechner)^[140]
• Gun City – a "Crazy Eddie"-type pitchman (Joe Piscopo) offers guns as Christmas presents.^[141]

H

• Hamburger Helper Anti-Bacterial - Chris Parnell pitches Hamburger Helper Anti-Bacterial, containing Tristanex, a power anti-bacterial agent, to grocery shoppers Will Ferrell and Ana Gasteyer who are unsure of how safe to eat the days-old hamburger meat in their refrigerator is. His cooking demonstration reveals the product's acrid smell, which means it's working, and that germ volume is "almost cut in half", by 37.99%.^[142]
• Handi-Off – a topical treatment used for removal of excess fingers. ("Also try new 'Toe-Riffic!'")^[143]
• Happy Fun Ball – a seemingly simple children's toy with dozens of disclaimers for absurdly dangerous health hazards and life-threatening properties, notably among them "Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball" and "Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin."^[144]
• Harley's Bristol Cream – a parody of Harvey's Bristol Cream, in which Gilda Radner uses the phone to find dates and then calls out to people on the street via opening the window.^[145]
• Have a Nice Day – a trailer for a horror movie where smiley faces haunt potential murder victims.^[146]
• Headz Up – An iPhone text-based app that clues people to their surroundings and keeps them out of danger while their eyes are glued to their tech devices.
• Hedley and Wyche: The British Toothpaste – spoofs the stereotype that the British, by and large, have poorly maintained teeth by showing them using a toothpaste sweetened with sugar. Mike Myers, Phil Hartman, Kevin Nealon, and Chris Farley starred in this parody.^[147]
• Hey, You – Gilda Radner appears in this sketch about a perfume for women in search of a one-night stand.^[148]
• Helmsley Spook House – Leona Helmsley (played by Nora Dunn) creates a haunted house with the same style, class, and obedient workers as her hotels.^[149]
• Herbal Essences Shampoo – A shampoo that when applied causes the person to react in a sexual manner.^[150]
• HiberNol – parody of NyQuil ads featuring a cold medicine designed to knock a person out for the entire cold and flu season. Phil Hartman appears as the onscreen announcer. "From the makers of Coma-Dose!"^[151]
• Hire The Incompetent – a temp agency that offers unskilled workers for hire; first appearance of Gilda Radner's recurring character Roseanne Roseannadanna.^[152]
• Holding Your Own Boobs Magazine – ad for a magazine featuring male and female celebrities cupping their breasts; spoofs the numerous copy-cat magazine covers that re-created Janet Jackson's famous 1993 Rolling Stone cover. Features Sarah Michelle Gellar and Will Ferrell.^[153]
• Home Security Decoy – mannequins posing as criminals already breaking into a house to trick real thieves into thinking it's already being robbed.^[154]
• Homocil – a special drug that helps reduce the stress of parents whose male children express homosexual tendencies. The tag line: "Because it's your problem, not theirs."^[155]
• How to Order Sushi Like a CEO – a pompous executive (Matt Dillon) promotes a book on how to order at sushi restaurants, all the while patronizing a sushi restaurant waitress (Maya Rudolph).^[156]
• Huggies Thong – useless diapers shaped like thongs; parodies the increasing phenomenon of the sexualization of young children, and parents who allow their children to dress in risqué, revealing clothing more suited for adults.^[157]

I

• Infiniti Toilets — Mike Myers in a toilet ad (same style as the Jonathan Pryce Infiniti J30 commercials).^[158]
• Interbank — A husband and wife (Will Ferrell and Molly Shannon) extol the aforementioned bank that sends black ops to find your stolen travelers checks.^[159]
• I Know Why The Caged Bird Laughs — Promo for a new TV show featuring Maya Angelou (played by Maya Rudolph) pulling pranks on her circle of celebrity friends; the pranks include putting a pie on Morgan Freeman's (Jay Pharoah) chair, taking the bottom out of Dr. Cornel West's (Kenan Thompson) suitcase, and interrupting Stephen King's (Bill Hader) book signing to tell him that his car has been towed.^[160]
• iPhone — Fred Armisen plays a man who uses his iPhone to keep his relationship with his pregnant wife separate from his affair with a French-Canadian woman whom he loves more.^[161] (In the NBC rebroadcasts, this was replaced with another iPhone ad, this time with Jason Sudeikis as a man who uses his iPhone to elude the police.^[162])
• i-Sleep Pro — From The Sharper Image comes this ambient sleep aid that has settings for "white noise" and "black noise"; the latter includes thumping bass music, dialogue from Tyler Perry sitcoms and the movie Friday, domestic arguments, and an old woman complaining about her foot pain (Jay Pharoah provides voice work for the device).^[163]
• I Was Not a Sucker for Saturday Night — Laraine Newman (as her recurring character Sherry) pitches a book about her risqué encounters with the male writers of Saturday Night Live.^[164]

J

• J.J. Casuals – Jack Johnson (Andy Samberg) promotes shoes shaped like bare feet for those who are as casual as he is.^[165]
• Jamitol – parody of Geritol in which a husband (Chevy Chase) extols the virtues of the multivitamin that has kept his wife (Michael O'Donoghue) working to the point of exhaustion. "My wife. I think I'll stuff her!"^[166][167]
• Jam Hawkers – carries the Smucker's slogan ("With a name like Smucker's, it has to be good!") to absurd extremes, promoting jams that taste so good that the manufacturers dare to give them horrible and disturbing names. Most members of the first-season cast appear as spokesmen, each trying to outdo the other on the "best" jam in the following order:^[168]
  • Jane Curtin – Fluckers: "It's got to be good!"
  • Chevy Chase – Nose Hair: "You can imagine how good it must be... mm–mm!"
  • Dan Aykroyd – Death Camp: "Just look for the barbed wire on the label!"
  • John Belushi – Dog Vomit & Monkey Pus: "This stuff has got to be terrific!"
  • Chevy Chase – Painful Rectal Itch: "The taste? (kisses fingers)"
  • Dan Aykroyd – Mangled Baby Ducks: "Great jam! Beautiful jam!"
  • John Belushi – 10,000 Nuns and Orphans (Jane: "What's so bad about that? John: They were all eaten by rats!") "Oh so good!"
  • Garrett Morris then brings in a jar that's "So disgusting you can't say it on television!"
• Jar Glove – In a parody of the black-and-white dramatizations of someone struggling to perform an everyday task without the use of the product being sold, a housewife (Kristen Wiig) accidentally kills her husband (Jason Sudeikis), resists arrest, is sentenced, goes to prison, plots and executes an escape, and hides out from prison guards—all because she struggled with opening the lid on a jar without benefit of the Jar Glove.^[169]
• Javis Homer Security System – a commercial that begins as a diaper ad featuring a man (Will Ferrell) reminiscing about the first time he changed his baby's diaper. The baby's mother (Ana Gasteyer) enters the room, yelling, "Who the hell are you?!" and the man makes a frantic escape out the window while the mother cries and holds her baby in fear.^[170]
• Jenson Mint – phony dollars and coins for rich people who want homeless panhandlers to leave them alone once and for all.^[171]
• Jewess Jeans – Gilda Radner models these jeans in this parody of Jordache jeans (and, to a lesser extent, Levy's rye bread). The tag line advises that "no one has to be Jewish" to wear Jewess ("but it wouldn't hurt", Radner adds).^[172]
• Jiffy Express – When you forgot your package had to be at its destination yesterday, Jiffy says "We'll take the package... AND the blame" by back-dating packages and simulating shipping delays.^[173]
• Jiffy Pop Air Bag – Eat popcorn while you're waiting for the ambulance to arrive.^[174]
• Jogger Motel – A parody of the commercials for Black Flag Roach Motel roach traps. Its tagline read, "Joggers jog in, but they don't jog out".^[175]
• Joe Dude,^[176] Joe Hetero,^[177] Joe Caucasian,^[178] and Joe Not-a-Rapist^[179] – promos for Fox reality shows based on Joe Millionaire, where a bachelor tricks female contestants into thinking he (or in the case of "Joe Dude", she) is male, heterosexual, white, or not a rapist.
• Jon Hamm's John Ham – the actor promotes ham you can eat while sitting on the toilet, complete with a dispenser similar to that of toilet paper.^[180]

K

• K-Put Price-Is-Rite Stamp Gun — a price-stamp gun that allows shoppers to freely alter the prices of various goods (particularly groceries) in their own favor.^[181]
• Kannon AE-1 — a camera "so simple, so advanced, even Stevie Wonder (as himself) can use it!" Spoof of Canon AE-1 SLR.^[182]
• Kate & Ali — a series of promos for a spoof of Kate & Allie—only instead of two divorced women, it's screen legend Katharine Hepburn (Martin Short) sharing a domicile with boxing great Muhammad Ali (Billy Crystal).^[183][184]
• KCF Shredders — Lampoons fast food industry's marketing to kids, in this case with lettuce. "Now with How Stella Got Her Groove Back action figures!"^[185]
• Kotex Classic — a very large sanitary napkin which includes a belt, and is clearly visible under a woman's clothing, very much like the sanitary napkins worn by women and girls of the 1950s.^[186]

L

• Lansford Brothers & Associates: Hangmen-At-Law – Businessman brothers (Will Forte and Bill Hader) offer professional Texas-style lynchings.^[187]
• "Law & Order: Parking Violations Unit" – parody of the numerous "Law & Order" spinoffs that were premiering at the time. It featured Steven Hill reprising his Law & Order role as Adam Schiff, District Attorney of New York County.^[188]
• Lemon Glow – an ex-biker chick (Molly Shannon) wistfully recalls her drugs-and-sex days while cleaning the middle-class home she's conned herself into.^[189]
• Leland-Meyers Home Headache Test (HHt) – Home test designed to determine if one is really having a headache or not, requiring the tester to "draw a moderate amount" of one's own blood, place a drop on the test strip, and wait two hours. If the spot turns blue, you have a headache! Parody of home pregnancy tests featuring Kevin Nealon & Janeane Garofalo.^[190]
• Lexon Paradox – Two automotive design teams produced two completely opposite cars (e.g., one was the most expensive car ever, the other the cheapest; one was the safest, the other designed to throw flaming victims hundreds of feet in a crash). In the end, the two were combined to create The Paradox.^[191]
• Liberty Medical – Wilford Brimley (John Goodman) pitches Liberty Medical Supplies delivery company. He begins by explaining how, with "dye-a-beetuss", he has to take extra care of his health, but continually qualifies, and admits to exaggerations, until by the end, he's described hiding a "food boner" over a delivery of $200 worth of pork ribs to his house, never having moved fast enough to sweat, and the fact that he may not even have diabetes—his doctor "just thinks I look like the kinda guy who would have it".^[192]
• Lil' Poundcake – A parody from season 37, of a doll that gives HPV vaccination shots to little girls.
• Lincoln Financial — Three spoofs of the investment company's "Get to know the future you" campaign, specifically an ad in which an airline passenger meets the future version of himself. In Ad #1, a man (Jason Sudeikis) has oral sex with his future self;^[193] in Ad #2, another man (Bill Hader) is told by his future self that he's going to gain weight, go bankrupt, fly to Hawaii, and kill himself (but not before making out with him);^[194] Ad #3 finds another man (guest Ben Stiller) mistaking an actual female passenger (Abby Elliott) for his transgendered future self.^[195]
• Lincoln MKC – guest host Jim Carrey lampoons Matthew McConaughey's exisential pitchwork for Lincoln's crossover utility vehicle in this trio of ads. McConaughey gets so lost in his deep thoughts, he drives right through an Allstate commercial parody, hitting Allstate pitchman Dennis Haysbert (Keenan Thompson) in the process. Carrey would later reprise that spoof in the Celebrity Jeopardy sketch in SNL's 40th Anniversary Special.^[196]
• Little Brothers – An ad similar in vein to Peyton Manning's "United Way" commercial; here, Manning's younger brother Eli is ambassador of a mentoring program for young boys who need a strong, male role model in their lives — and someone to beat up their mean older brothers (one of which, played by Andy Samberg, is locked in the trunk of a car and mistakenly referred to as "Peyton"). The commercial ends with the tag line "Little Brothers: Because the time of reckoning is now at hand", followed by Eli and his young charges laughing maniacally.^[197]
• Litter Critters – Cheri Oteri appears in this sketch about a kit that allows children to take their cat's fecal waste and mold it into fun figurines. "♪♫ When you hear a scratch, here comes a batch — It's time for Litter Critters! ♪♫"^[198]
• Little Chocolate Donuts — "decathlon champion John Belushi" promotes "The Donuts of Champions" in this parody of Bruce Jenner's ^{[lower-alpha 1]} Wheaties ads.^[200]
• Long White Beard – "Let 'em know you've been waiting." Featured various cast members and actors wearing obviously fake, long, white beards in situations where someone has kept them waiting.^[201]
• The Looker – Penny Marshall (Fred Armisen) stars in a new crime drama as a police interrogator who gets suspects to sign confessions simply by staring at them for long periods of time.^[202]
• Loose Bear – a hallucinogenic laxative that makes you dream you're being chased by a hungry bear, thus "scaring the crap out of you".^[203]
• Lori Davis Hair Spray Exciting Hold – Listed in the SNL sketch records as "Focus on Beauty II", this infomercial spoof promotes an environmentally conscious hair spray with no alcohol in it, featuring guest host Christina Applegate as Cher, Chris Farley as Lori Davis, and Phil Hartman as "Brad in the Lab".^[204]
• The Love Toilet – Victoria Jackson & Kevin Nealon share the most intimate moment of them all... on a single-based toilet with two seats, placed so that the seated users can face each other. "Because when you're in love, even five minutes apart can seem like an eternity."^[205]
• The Lung Brush – used every night by heavy smoker Chris Farley to remove quarts of tar from his lungs before going to bed with wife Victoria Jackson ("Did you forget to brush?"). Former NFL quarterback Ken Stabler makes a celebrity endorsement cameo.^[206]
• Lux 420 SL – the car for the insane; designed by such notables as Nostradamus and featuring an in-console sink for compulsive hand-washing, along with enough trunk space to hold copious vials of one's own urine. Also featured the jingle: "There's a radio in my fingernail...CAR!!"^[207]

M

• Magic Mouth – a device which is inserted into the rectum and converts flatulence into "polished expressions" (e.g. "Did you see Charlie Rose last night?").^[208]
• MartinSheen – a hair spray which consisted of guest Martin Sheen sipping water from a paper cup and spitting it on Jane Curtin's hair as she pitched the product, pausing occasionally to nod in agreement with her statements (e.g. "MartinSheen is eco-friendly. You wouldn't dream of hurting the environment, would you?").^[209]
• Mary-Kate & Ashley Perfume – The perfume that fits your mood, whether you're an Ashley or a Mary-Kate. A female voice-over whispers "Ashley" to one activity and "Mary-Kate" to one in contrast.^[210]
• Maybelline For Men – Finally, cosmetics for guys.^[211]
• McIntosh Jr. – an elementary-school cafeteria parody of early Macintosh computer ads. "McIntosh Jr.: The Power to Crush the Other Kids!"^[212]
• McIntosh Post-It Notes (sic) – parody of the Apple Newton MessagePad.^[213]
• Me-Harmony.com – a 2005 parody of eHarmony promotes a matchmaking website for narcissists. Various SNL castmembers have dual roles as both the happy Me-Harmony client and, in drag, their perfect mate. The ad also promotes its sister service, the gay matchmaking site He-Harmony.com.^[214]
• Mel's Char Palace – Mel (Dan Aykroyd), with help from a saw-wielding "Mrs. Mel" (Gilda Radner), promotes his steakhouse on "Route 17, Paramus" where you select your own steer, cuts and portions ("You stun it, you cut it, you charbroil it").^[215][216]
• Mercury Mistress – A spoof of luxury-car ads, this ad promotes "a car so sexy, you'll just want to have sex with it" (because a rubber vagina is hidden behind its license plate).^[217]
• Metrocard – a credit card ad starring Roseanne Barr as a sassy customer service representative and Phil Hartman as a business traveler in need of assistance. Says Barr: "Yeah, like I've got nothing better to do than to sit around and listen to him bitch!"^[218]
• Michael Phelps Diet – Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps shows his "eat whatever you want, and as much as you want" diet which is almost certainly fatal to anyone who isn't an Olympic athlete because of its high caloric count (12,000 calories, which is the actual number of calories Michael Phelps was required to eat while training). Jared Fogle appears, stating "this diet sucks a foot long".^[219]
• Middle American Van Lines – A moving company that moves families instead of their belongings.^[220]
• The Midnight Coterie of Sinister Intruders – a trailer for a home invasion slasher movie as directed by Wes Anderson, starring Owen Wilson (Edward Norton), Gwyneth Paltrow (Noël Wells), Danny Glover (Jay Pharoah), Tilda Swinton (Kate McKinnon), Anjelica Huston [misspelled as "Angelica" in its premiere; the online version and all TV reruns fix the spelling mistake] (Cecily Strong), Jason Schwartzmann (Kyle Mooney), Adrien Brody (Mike O'Brien), a stop-motion mouse, and Alec Baldwin (appearing as himself) as the narrator.
• Milsford Spring Water – Tom Bodett narrates as a bottled water's unusually "rich history" is re-enacted: Rather than share a spring with neighboring Dunbee, the town of Milsford brutally destroys Dunbee and most of its residents — "over 107... days ago. You probably heard about it on the TV".^[221]
• Mom Celebrity Translator – A handheld electronic device that allows young'uns to decipher what well-known celebrity their unhip mothers are trying to describe to them.^[222]
• Mom Jeans – Available (fictitiously) at J. C. Penney, these jeans fit Mom just the way she likes it! "She'll love the 9-inch zipper and casual front pleats!" The tagline: "I'm not a woman anymore. I'm a mom!"^[223]
• Mostly Garbage Dog Food – Dog lover Jason Sudeikis gets his priorities straight by serving bagged garbage to his canine pal as a money-saving measure because of current economic issues.^[224]

N

• Navy Adventure (Port of Call: Bayonne, New Jersey) – Instead of training and missions, this spot featured the sailors doing other things, such as cleaning toilets, peeling potatoes, and doing laundry. The tag line: "It's not just a job; it's $96.78 a week!"^[225]
• NBC: Our Age Is Showing – self-parody of NBC's 1981–1982 ad campaign "Our Pride Is Showing".^[226]
• NCI – A long-distance phone company that will do anything to be your phone company, including murdering people.
• Nebulzitol (No-Balls-At-All) – what to give your husband when he's got March Madness^[227]
• Nerf Crotchbat – a parody of Nerf's glut of products and seemingly desperate straits where new product ideas are concerned; an off-scale baseball bat made from nerf material. Chris Farley and Rob Schneider, with a group of children, are bored. Suddenly, Farley gleefully announces, "CROTCH BAT!!" The bats appear and the group wields them, repeatedly striking each other in the genitals while typical commercial theme music plays. Also advertised is "Nerf Crotch Missile" and "Nerf Nerf", a formless plasmatic blob of Nerf foam material.^[228]
• Network Battle of the T's & A's – parody of both 1970s television specials featuring stars from the three major American TV networks (Battle of the Network Stars) and of the trend of "T & A" ("tits and ass") programming featuring suggestively clad women.^[229]
• Neutrogena Coin Slot Moisturizer – parody of various Neutrogena ads for specialized moisturizing products. Featured host Lindsay Lohan and feature player Kristen Wiig as young women in low-rise jeans. Premise is that since new fashions increasingly leave your coin slot exposed to sun and wind, a special moisturizer is required to keep it soft and supple.^[230]
• New Shimmer — Gilda Radner and Dan Aykroyd play a couple having an argument over whether New Shimmer is a floor wax or a dessert topping ("It's a dessert topping, YOU COW!"); Chevy Chase (as a product demonstrator) steps in and demonstrates to the couple (and the audience) that "New Shimmer is a floor wax and a dessert topping!"^[231]
• Nicotrel – a parody of smoking-cessation products featuring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson as ex-Army soldier Nick Cotrell, who beats up a wimpy husband (played by Chris Parnell) to get him to quit smoking. At the end of the sketch, other wrestlers (including Mick Foley, Paul "Big Show" Wight, and Paul "Triple H" Levesque) join in the action.^[232]
• Nikey Turkey – Featuring Chris Rock, this parody offers the perfect Thanksgiving solution to a small turkey for a large gathering: "Pump it up!"^[233]
• Nike Air Force – features cast members Fred Armisen, Bill Hader, Will Forte, Kenan Thompson, Andy Samberg, and Jason Sudeikis playing basketball and messing up, which ends with Samberg getting injured.^[234] Sketch called Air Force One.
• "No, Bruce! Let Me Finish!" The Best of Celebrity Tirades – Following the real-life incident in which he mercilessly berated a movie-production crew member for simply moving a lighting rack, Christian Bale (played by host Bradley Cooper), in an attempt to take some heat off of himself, hawks a DVD of footage featuring other celebrities, such as George Foreman (Kenan Thompson), Joan Cusack (Abby Elliott), Mad Money's Jim Cramer (Darrell Hammond), and Nathan Lane (Bobby Moynihan) screaming at crew members for their perceived incompetence, with all proceeds going to Bale's legal defense fund.^[235]
• North American Savings – A savings bank that claims to keep one's money safe by making virtually no loans at all, "rejecting 97% of all loan applications".
• Nuva Bling — a parody on the Nuva Ring birth control commercials, in which it also doubles as a jewelry accessory (placed around the vaginal area) for women who are not trying to get pregnant while enjoying the night out, and can be customized. The only drawback is they also complain that it hurts as well, as evidenced by the testimonials from the users.^[236]

O

• Old Glory Insurance – a parody of older celebrities (such as Wilford Brimley and Alex Trebek) promoting insurance for senior citizens. Sam Waterston, in a deadpan performance as "Paid Spokesperson", touts the advantages of the only life insurance company to provide full coverage against the leading killer of the elderly: attacks from robots that feed on the medications the elderly often use.^[237]
• Only Bangkok – parody of Las Vegas's "What Happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas" commercials, shown in three parts. In part one, Ben Affleck (playing himself) sells his wife (played by Amy Poehler) to two burly mob members after losing a bet during a Russian Roulette match.^[238] In part two, a businessman (Seth Meyers) calls his friend for the number of a Dutch man who can help him remove a Thai hooker who ended up dead after he had sex with her.^[239] In the final part, Seth's businessman character is back and on the phone with the Dutchman about the removal of a dead prostitute—but this time the prostitute is a male! Also joining the businessman is Affleck in a pink robe, earrings, and wearing make-up (who asks the Dutchman [played by Darrell Hammond] if he's interested in buying panda meat) and a paranoid Kelly Ripa (in a cameo appearance) wielding a meat cleaver and exhorting the businessman to cut the prostitute up and put the remains in a bag.^[240]
• Oops I Crapped My Pants – a brand of adult diapers, a parody of Depends, and a play on the use of statements as product names (e.g. "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!").^[241]

P

• Pan Am – thanks to good security and low fares, it's a good time to fly because of their best offer: Fly to Brussels, Rome or London, you get to keep the plane you flew on.^[242]
• Paxil—Second-Term Strength: An anti-depressant made especially for Barack Obama (Jay Pharoah) as he tries to deal with his second term as President and all of the scandals and failures (such as the Benghazi scandal, the IRS scandal, General Petraeus's sex scandal, and Obamacare). Also available in Republican Strength for John Boehner (Taran Killam).
• Pennzoil – endorsed by poet Maya Angelou (David Alan Grier) with typically flowery, emotional, hyperbolic prose.^[243]
• Pepto-Bismol Ice – Nasim Pedrad appears in this sketch about the famous pink antacid in malt liquor form.^[244]
• Petchow Rat Poison – parody of misleading labels, Hank Petchow's brand of rat poison looks like dog food, is packaged in a 25 lb. bag with "PetChow" in large print, has a large photo of Petchow's dog, and the words "rat poison" in very fine print.^[245]
• Philadelphia – a line of action figures along with a video game (which is actually footage from the Sega Genesis port of Galaxy Force II) based on the 1993 film of the same name.^[246]
• Phone Company – Features Lily Tomlin as a grouchy, apathetic operator who relates the goings-on and imperfections of her company. "We don't care. We don't have to. We're the Phone Company." Sketch called Ernestine.^[247]
• The Players-With-Yourself Club – Telly Savalas (Phil Hartman) promotes a discount card for chronic masturbators.^[248]
• Pre-Chewed Charlie's – a steakhouse for people with dentures, where the waiters come to your table and chew your food for you.^[249]
• Preparation H – Skateboarding dudes, including Jimmy Fallon, plug Preparation H in urban slang ("I'm about ta drop an H-BOMB on dis rizzoid!").^[250]
• Punk'd Barely Legal: Ashton Kutcher (played by host Justin Timberlake) releases a DVD of his Punk'd pranks that were never shown on TV due to legal issues, such as Fred Durst (Jeff Richards) getting mugged, Christina Aguilera (Maya Rudolph) suffering from morning sickness after Kutcher steals her birth control pills, and 50 Cent (Finesse Mitchell) shooting Dax Shepard (Will Forte) dressed as a vampire (which, to Kutcher, is a "double punk" because Dax didn't know he was going to get shot and 50 Cent didn't know the vampire was Dax).^[251]
• Puppy Uppers and Doggie Downers – Gilda Radner complains to Laraine Newman that her dog Sparky has no energy, so Newman recommends Puppy Uppers. Later, when the dog is hyperactive (and quite a bit smaller), Radner complains that "Sparky's perked up a little too much", so Newman recommends dosing him with Doggie Downers.^[252]

Q

• Quarry — Jane Curtin appears in this sketch about "the only [breakfast] cereal that's pure 100% rocks and pebbles", parodying the glut of "natural", earthy, and crunchy (deafeningly, in this case) granola-based cereals popular in the mid-1970s. The tag line: "Better tastin', 'cause it's mined".^[253]

R

• RAD 3000 — a smoke detector that plays songs of the 1980s.^[254]
• ReaganCo. — Charles Rocket demonstrates how you can show your patriotism by way of Ronald Reagan wallpaper, cosmetics, and bathroom tiles.^[255]
• Royal Deluxe II — 1970s car commercial parody that demonstrates the smoothness of the car's ride by having a mohel perform a circumcision in the back seat while the car is driven at forty miles per hour on a bumpy road.^[256]
• Rubik's Grenade — Rubik's Cube parody; "May be the last puzzle you'll never solve".^[257]
• Russell & Tate Law Firm — parody of "ambulance-chasing" legal-services commercials, an ad for a law firm whose partners are two intimidating black men with extensive "resumés" who repeatedly pledge to "git your money".^[258]

S

• Salon — Features David Spade as a "flamboyant" beauty salon operator pitching a hairspray that is activated by saying "salon" repeatedly (in the exaggerated French manner, with a sibilant 'S' and the accent on the first syllable). He teaches Victoria Jackson how to say it "properly".^[259]
• Schmitt's Gay — in this spoof of beer companies' targeting of specific demographics, two housesitters (Chris Farley & Adam Sandler) are discouraged at the filthy condition of the backyard pool. When the water is turned on, however, it magically transforms into a sparkling clean pool filled with attractive, and presumably gay, men wearing bikini swim trunks, whom the housesitters merrily cavort with.^[260]
• Settl - As its name implies, this mobile dating app is aimed at women willing to settle for dates and relationships with, as one user puts it, "normal guys with characteristics I am now willing to overlook."^[261]
• Shirt in a Can — Tim Meadows spills something on his shirt, so he sprays on this product.^[262]
• Short & Curly — The shampoo men use to keep their pubic hairs clean and shiny. Also promoted is Short, Dark, Curly, and Lovely, "but that, my friends, is strictly for the brothers".^[263]
• Sofa King — furniture store ad featuring a family of apparent Middle Eastern origins with thick accents. Everything in the ad is promoted with the adjective "Sofa King" (as in, "It's Sofa King comfortable!"), but the accents make it sound like "so fucking".^[264]
• Speed — Veteran SNL writer Anne Beatts makes a rare on-screen appearance as a housewife able to happily multi-task, thanks to Speed, the diet pill you don't have to be overweight to use. Obtainable from your doctor, your neighbor's doctor, your college roommate's doctor, etc.^[265]
• Spitzer and Associates — Following his resignation due to the sex scandal involving his money laundering and dalliances with high-priced call girls, Eliot Spitzer (Bill Hader) is now opening a private practice dealing with embarrassing sex-related issues. Sketch called "Spitzer Cold Open."^[266]
• Spud Beer — "Filled with the full, rich flavor of potatoes", this beer is "brewed for people who can't taste the difference", in this case an electroshock subject (writer Alan Zweibel). The end tagline: "Spud! The beer that made Boise famous!"^[267]
• Steve Martin's All-Natural Penis Beauty Cream (New Formula) — a parody of the celebrity infomercial boom.^[268]
• Sub Shack — a parody of the Subway Jared Fogle ad campaign, with customers of the fast-food restaurant gaining weight rather than losing it.^[269]
• Super Bass-O-Matic '76 — This parody of Ronco ads features Dan Aykroyd pureeing raw fish in a blender, as well as Laraine Newman delivering the happy pitch line, "Wow, that's terrific bass."^[270]
• Suppressex — an anti-arousal medicine taken to prevent erections from occurring at inopportune moments.^[271]
• Swiffer Sleepers — parody of Swiffer ads with children's blanket sleepers designed to pick up dust and dirt as they crawl.^[272]
• Swiftamine – a medication designed to fight bouts of vertigo caused by enjoyment of Taylor Swift's music.^[273]
• Swill — Bill Murray extols the qualities of this putrid mineral water "dredged from Lake Erie", the packaging of which looks nearly identical to Perrier. A highlight is the slow pouring of Swill from the bottle, set to the refrain of Carly Simon's "Anticipation", a song used to promote another slow-pouring food item at the time, Heinz Ketchup.^[274]

T

• Taco Town – a restaurant parody of Taco Bell, advertising a new taco with layer after layer of outer crust, finished with a Chicago-style pizza and blueberry pancake, and "deep fried to perfection". Andy Samberg says of the product, "Pizza? Now that's what I call a taco!"^[275]
• Tech-Pack – A man (Jason Sudeikis) shows a harried woman (Kristen Wiig) at the airport a new wearable pouch system that can hold and activate all electronics (mp3 players, PDAs, cellphones, etc.) with a joystick, but scares other passengers because of its uncanny resemblance to a suicide belt.^[276]
• Teddy Bear Holding a Heart – a spoof of a De Beers commercial, where a guy gives his sweetheart a teddy bear holding a heart for Valentine's Day, the gift available practically everywhere.^[277]
• Texxon – An image ad shown during "network newsbreaks", including those following the Buckwheat assassination, ostensibly touting the philanthropic efforts of that petroleum company; they successively degenerate into thinly veiled threats of dire consequences if various legislation under consideration doesn't go the company's way, supposedly forcing it to scale back efforts to assist the needy: "Texxon. Do what we say, and nobody gets hurt."^[278][279]
• That's Not Yogurt! – spoof of "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!" ads and the TCBY frozen-yogurt chain. (The latter's acronymic name was originally supposed to stand for "This Can't Be Yogurt!" but was later revised to stand for "The Country's Best Yogurt".) After eating the product, a couple (Victoria Jackson and Kevin Nealon) becomes very concerned about what the mysterious product actually is, but the coy announcer refuses to tell them. "From the makers of Those Aren't Olives!"^[280]
• Three-Legged Jeans – "And hey, not any dumber than acid-washed!" The chorus of the reggae-tinged theme music features the catchphrases "Three at last" and "A leg and a leg and a leg" sung together.^[281]
• Tim and Meat's One-Stop Rocky Horror Shop – Tim Curry and Meat Loaf (both appearing as themselves) are proprietors of a store with props and costumes based on and to wear and use for midnight screenings of the 1975 cult film The Rocky Horror Picture Show.^[282]
• Tortumatic – the ultimate way to show others that you can take pain. Charles Rocket demonstrates it, getting punched repeatedly by a number of boxing gloves, and slamming his hand with a mallet.^[283]
• Totino's Pizza Rolls - Vanessa Bayer, reprising her dutiful housewife role from the "Totino's Super Bowl Activity Pack" ad of one year earlier (see below), serves Pizza Rolls to "my hungry guys" (guest host Larry David among them) watching and reacting to the big game in unison. Something is seriously amiss, however, when she discovers the guys are shouting at a blank TV screen, only to turn around all at once — and revealing icy stares with solid black eyes — when she grabs a pair of scissors for self-defense. The punch line: The ad is actually a promotion for the recently revived series The X-Files.^[284]
• Totino's Super Bowl Activity Pack – while the husband (guest host J.K. Simmons) and his buddies watch the big game and chow down on Totino's Pizza Rolls in the living room, the wife (Vanessa Bayer) can keep herself occupied in the kitchen with this set of games and toys specifically made "for grown women ages 5 and up" (e.g. puzzles, play money, miniature top).^[285]
• Tressant Suprème – Kelly Ripa spoofs the numerous hair coloring ads in which she has appeared. In this parody, Ripa prefers Tressant Suprème because it contains "just a little bit of crack cocaine", thus explaining her well-known "peppy" persona.^[286]
• Trilocaine – a scalp-itch medication with extremely disturbing side effects. "90% of users experience an instantaneous and horrifying sleep paralysis containing a bleak vision of mortality."^[287]
• Triopenin – arthritis medication in a bottle that's virtually impossible to open.^[288]
• Triple Trac Razor – a razor with three blades because the consumer is gullible enough to believe what he sees on TV commercials (this was written in the years before razors had progressed past two blades).^[289]
• Turlington's Lower Back Tattoo Remover – a product that, "when applied once every hour for 72 straight hours", slowly burns away unwanted lower back tattoos. "That tingling means it's working!" Tagline: "Because it won't be cool forever".^[290]
• Tylenol B.M. – a laxative product shown to cause you to defecate while you sleep.^[291]

U

• Uncle Jemima's Pure Mash Liquor – A not-so-subtle barb at products that perpetuate racial stereotypes, specifically Aunt Jemima and Uncle Ben's, and also referencing Uncle Remus as shown in scenes similar to those in Disney's animated film Song of the South.^[292]
• Under Underground Rock Festival – A series of commercials which poke fun at the crazy promotions at alternative concerts, crazy special guests, as well as the extremes people will go to defy conformity. Done in the style of Gathering of the Juggalos infomercials.^[293]
• United Way with Peyton Manning – Manning (as himself) appears in this 2007 spoof of self-serving philanthropic public-service ads by popular athletes. Documentary-style, Manning is shown "mentoring" children; what ensues is Manning physically and verbally abusing the kids during a football game (hitting kids in the back of the head with a football and sending one of them to sit in a Port-A-Let for messing up a play), and afterwards teaching his charges how to break into an SUV, exploiting a little girl to get a date with an attractive woman, showing kids a tabloid magazine featuring Angelina Jolie, drinking beer in front of them, and admitting that he would kill anyone who snitches on him.^[294]
• Urban Sleepy Boy 2000 – Tim Kazurinsky A weapon that detects and destroys cars when their alarms go off, enabling the weapon's owner to get a good night's sleep.^[295]
• Urigro – parody of male enhancement medications; a pill that gives its male users an absurdly long and strong stream of urine.^[296]
• UPS – starring Bill Hader as ad man/actor Andy Azula, making fun of the prevalence of Azula's ad campaign as well as his hairstyle.^[297]
• Uvula Public Service Spot – Chevy Chase as a physician urging Gilda Radner and the audience to take proper care of the uvula, without ever saying what the uvula actually is. (It is a small piece of flesh that hangs down from the rear portion of the soft palate and requires little, if any, maintenance.)^[298]

V

• Valtrex – A husband repeatedly affirms his fidelity to his wife during a commercial for a pill that treats genital herpes.^[299]
• Veritas Ultrasound HD – Instead of a tiny monitor, the ultrasound is displayed on a widescreen HD television. It even has options to display a football helmet on the fetus (for dads-to-be missing a Sunday football because they're accompanying the wife to see the ultrasound).^[300]

W

• Wade Blasingame: Not the ballplayer, the Attorney-at-Law – the lawyer (Will Ferrell) people call to sue dogs. Ad features Chris Parnell acting like a dog.^[301]
• We're Just Friends – Short shorts for men (Jason Sudeikis and Andy Samberg) whose close friendship is often mistaken for a gay relationship^[302]
• Where You're Going – parody of 1980s Michelob commercials in which Jon Lovitz, Randy Quaid, Damon Wayans, Anthony Michael Hall and others are shown celebrating their latest conquests in the business world and living the good life, until the end of the commercial where they all burn in Hell for living spiritually bankrupt, avaricious lives.^[303]
• Wilson Trap Doors – office trap doors that effectively do away with unwanted guests, clients or employees.^[304]
• Wilson Countersink Flanges and Dorry Flanges – Phil Hartman narrates this commercial for technically complex industrial supplies (with Chris Farley and Rob Schneider).^[305]
• Woomba – a self-operating electronic feminine hygiene product that knows when women should use it, whether they want to or not; a parody of the Roomba automatic vacuum system.^[306]
• Wrangler Open Fly Jeans – Finally, jeans with no fly so that your parts are always camera-ready, as pitched by Brett Favre (played by Jason Sudeikis)^[307]

Y

• Yard-a-Pult – A product created to launch unwanted trash/deceased pets/etc. over your fence rather than going to the time and expense of disposing of them properly.^[308]
• Yum Bubble Genital Herpes Gum – A fruit-flavored bubble gum that controls genital herpes.^[309]

Z

• Z-Shirt – Its name sums up what the product is: A 1990s-style neon shirt with a "Z" on the front. ("This ain't no t-shirt, it's a Z-Shirt!") The comedy comes when the shirt-wearer's buddy (guest host Kevin Hart) goes through the alphabet and asks, "Wait, I'm confused. Is it an A-Shirt?" "Is it a B-Shirt?" etc.^[310]

Notes

1. Bruce Jenner is now known as Caitlyn Jenner due to gender transition in 2015.^[199]

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266. "Saturday Night Spitzer Cold Open". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
267. "Spud Beer". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
268. "Saturday Night Live Steve Martin's Penis Beauty Creme". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
269. "Saturday Night Live Subshack". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
270. "Bassomatic Video by Saturday Night Live". Retrieved 20 May 2012.
271. "Saturday Night Live: Suppressex". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
272. "Saturday Night Live Swiffer Sleepers". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
273. Swiftamine parody from Yahoo! Screen (accessed 2/16/2015)
274. "Swill". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
275. Taco Town from http://danwho.net
276. "Tech Pack". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
277. "A Teddy Bear Holding a Heart". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
278. "Special Report". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
279. "Texxon". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
280. "Saturday Night Live That's Not Yogurt". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
281. "Saturday Night Live Leevi's 3 Legged Jeans". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
282. "Saturday Night Live 1981 (Tim and Meat's One-Stop Rocky Horror Shop)". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
283. "Saturday Night Live Tortu-Matic". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
284. Totino's ad parody (accessed 2/7/2016)
285. Totino's Super Bowl Commercial parody (accessed 2/4/2015)
286. "Saturday Night Live Tressant Supreme". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
287. "SNL – Trilocaine". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
288. "Triopenin". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
289. "Triple-Trac". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
290. "Saturday Night Live Turlington's Lower Back Tattoo Remover". Retrieved 26 May 2012.
291. "Saturday Night Live Tylenol BM". Retrieved 4 May 2012.
292. "Saturday Night Live Uncle Jemimas Pure Mash Liquor". Retrieved 8 May 2012.
293. "Saturday Night Live Underground Festival". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
294. "Saturday Night Live SNL Digital Short United Way". Retrieved 18 May 2012.
295. "Saturday Night Live Urban Sleepy Boy 2000". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
296. "Saturday Night Live Urigro". Retrieved 18 May 2012.
297. "Saturday Night Live UPS 1". Retrieved 18 May 2012.
298. "Babs' Uvula". Retrieved 18 May 2012.
299. "Saturday Night Live: Genital Herpes". Retrieved 4 May 2012.
300. "Veritas Ultrasound HD". Retrieved 18 May 2012.
301. "Saturday Night Live Wade Blasingame". Retrieved 8 May 2012.
302. "Saturday Night Live We're Just Friends". Retrieved 4 August 2012.
303. "Saturday Night Live Where You're Going". Retrieved 27 May 2012.
304. "Saturday Night Live – Trap Door Season: 13". Retrieved 8 May 2012.
305. Wilson Countersink Flanges and Dorry Flanges, a transcript from http://snltranscripts.jt.org/
306. "Saturday Night Live Woomba". Retrieved 4 May 2012.
307. "Brett Favre Wrangler Open Fly Jeans SNL Skit". Retrieved 4 May 2012.
308. "Saturday Night Live Yard A Pult". Retrieved 4 May 2012.
309. "Saturday Night Live Yum Bubble Genital Herpes Gum". Retrieved 4 May 2012.
310. Z-Shirt parody from Yahoo! Screen (accessed 2/16/2015

External links

• Saturday Night Live Archives
• TVScout.ca Fake SNL Commercials in Canada